Whether you want to call it “empowerment” or simply just liking and accepting yourself for the way you are, having confidence in WHO you really are and knowing your strengths and abilities can help you live a more satisfying and less-stressful existence.
Understand that…
Number-one, YOU can’t do
it all, sometimes you need a bit of help.
And number-two, YOU don’t
know EVERYTHING.
Taking charge of yourself
and being responsible for living the life you want to live does NOT mean that you
become that proverbial island that needs no one else. It does mean that YOU are
the “Expert of You”, you are capable of making your own decisions, enjoying
your own personal likes, and CAN take care of yourself to the best of your
ability; yes, sometimes you are allowed to accept a helping hand. Sometimes it
is even okay to allow yourself to be pampered a bit and enjoy having someone do
something for you.
Start your journey
towards self-empowerment by examining you: What are your skills and knowledge?
What can you do to learn who to do things you want or need done? And who do you
have around that can help guide you through new experiences? Make a list of
REASONABLE goals for yourself — and by setting a goal, make a plan, set a
schedule, and don’t be afraid to revise your list of goals every few months or
so.
Being reasonable also
means that you are honest in assessing your own abilities. Not everyone has the
necessary physical strength to move furniture, or is tall enough to reach that
top shelf without a step-stool, and not everyone can drive a car (just a few
things…). Maybe you do have a “disability”, but most disabilities should
not make you totally dependent on others to do simple tasks. What kinds of workarounds
can you come up with to level the playing field? Again, what are things you CAN
learn to do? You would be surprised how many wives and husbands have no idea
how to even balance a checkbook or be able to contact their financial
institution for necessary paperwork.
If you are in a relationship,
you probably find that you like doing things for each other. My late parents
used to tell everyone that my mom treated my dad “like a king”, but also my dad
treated my mom “like a queen”. Sharing life and doing things for each other out
of love, enjoyment and comfort is pretty darn terrific. BUT, never become so dependent
that you turn your partner into a “servant” and you forget how to do things for
yourself. Relationships should be reciprocal but never a crutch.
Positivity is a major
factor in self-empowerment. Be positive about you, acknowledge your strengths and
don’t dwell on your limits. Avoid negativity, both your own and the people
around you. Voice YOUR thoughts, you don’t need permission to speak up about
something you like or want. Don’t be afraid to speak up, throw in choices, make
decisions and more. Let go of mistakes and disappointments of the past and find
things to look forward to in the near future. Don’t worry about what others
think, you are the one who lives with you. Recognize all the things you have to
be happy about or at least content. Be assertive. Trust your close
relationships.
When you feel good about yourself life really can become easier to deal with.
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