Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior round. Every week writers post 8 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
Just before Justin is called back to work to meet with an important supplier, he tells Layne he'd like to move her and Dennis to an apartment near him so he can keep them safe and take care of them; Layne feels he's moving too fast. He promises to return in a few days. The next day Layne gets Dennis to school and goes to work. (Layne is a receptionist at a realty office; her friend Rita is the office manager)
(the following has been edited to fit) ...and now the
When Layne got to work she was
feeling very unsettled, a situation she blamed Justin for. Her boss went to a
seminar in a nearby town and the office was short-staffed. A strange man came
into the office, loud and demanding to see her boss; an agent offered to help
and the irate man complained about "Miss Gillette".
Rita came in during the fracas
and managed to calm the agitated man down; he wouldn't leave his name or any
message when he left.
Layne suddenly got up and
looked back over her desk, "is there any place here that says my
name?"
"You're wearing a name
tag."
"My name tag only has my
first name, how did he know my last name?" She looked troubled, "Rita, I'm not an unwed mother, I
think my husband may be looking for Dennis."
"You're married?"
"Can Dennis stay with you
tonight?"
For more WeWriWa Snippets, go to:
About Common Bond, Tangled Hearts
Layne Gillette’s world is turned upside down when a man she has never met shows up to lay claim as the father of her 6-year old son.
Justin, the victim of a fraternity prank, and Layne, the subject of a forced insemination, have produced a beautiful child that they are both willing to protect… at all costs.
The two parents realize they can love each other, but when Layne’s abusive “ex-husband” shows up, they are torn apart by danger, kidnapping and lies. Justin won’t give up until Layne is returned to him. Layne uses her newfound strength, courage and knowledge to defy Charlie’s ugliest demands.
~~~~~~~~
All through the month of September, I will be posting my short story Pussy Cat Tales in serialized version on my Facebook page. Come back every other day for another installment. Just visit Author Chelle Cordero to follow along. (Catch up with installment #1 and installment #2)
The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero
Nine short stories and a special bonus section:
Introduction; Pussycat Tails; Holiday Happiness; Not Alone; I Swear That Raccoon Just Knocked on the Door; Stormy Weather; A Mother’s Love; More Than a Friend; The Meeting; & The Vacation.
Something for everyone humor, drama, passion, suspense, and more!
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16 comments:
Ah, the pot stirs some more. I hope she takes Justin up on his offer soon, but probably not soon enough to avoid more trouble, right?
I suspect that this will be very strong motivation for her to move. Which as we all know is what really has to happen if she and Justin are going to learn to get along.
Ooh, sounds like she may be in danger, better move quick!
We are all invested in your story so make sure she and her son are safe or else!This is quite a journey, Chelle. Wonderful.
That is pretty scary. I hope Rita lends a helping hand.
Great snippet.
An ominous development and I'm sure there'll be more trouble ahead. Enjoying the story, very tense, waiting for whatever will happen next! Great snippet.
Uh oh! Trouble ahead. Loads of tension in this scene, Chelle. Good snippet!
Oh boy ... i hope the boy is safe, and I hope she'll take up on Justin's offer to mover her and her son closer to him.
This would scare the pants off any parent, especially in this case. Well done.
I'm curious to know who the man was. Surely if it was her husband she'd have recognized him and he'd have recognized her...
"Fracas", is one of my very favorite words in the English language. I appreciate how the conflict with the customer kind of foreshadows the conflicts to come.
Uh... Oh... Things are about to get ugly, I can see it now. Great snippet, and great set up of conflict to come. I get the feeling she's going to take up Justin's offer now. Can't wait to see what happens!
This is very suspicious. I think it's time to run, I can see the danger approaching.
I fear for her. I bet she's thinking about taking Justin's offer now. :)
Ooh, chills here my friend. That was amazing writing! Nice touch with the name tag also.
Quick of her to notice, but this means her creep of a husband has found her, doesn't it? The man might not have seen her, but surely he had it confirmed that she works there.
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