Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior round. Every week writers post 8 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
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Welcome to a snippet from Courage of the Heart. Courage of the Heart was originally published by Xlibris in 1999 (BEFORE they went full vanity press) - with no real marketing efforts from the publisher and before I knew much about the subject, it didn't do very well. However it was revised slightly and republished by Vanilla Heart Publishing in 2009 and has enjoyed a healthier reception.
The opening scene, actually the prologue, opens with our hero, Adam, and our heroine, Davie, in bed about to make love for the first time. However Davie confesses something to Adam... and his reaction is certainly not what she expected. Creative punctuation has been used (of course) so it is only 8 sentences:
Davie felt another shudder run through her, "but, I don't know…Adam, I," she inhaled sharply as she felt his fingers probing inside her, "Adam…I've never…"
For the first time Adam remained motionless, "never…what?"
"I've…never been with a man before," she sensed his withdrawal before he actually pulled away.
Adam's brow was furrowed, "what are you saying, Davie?"
The icy chill that Davie felt left her feeling embarrassed to be lying naked in bed with this man, she pulled the bedsheet over her exposed breasts, "I've never been with a man…before"
He sat upright in bed seemingly unaware that he was just as naked as she was, "are you telling me that you're a virgin?"
Davie sat up clutching the bed linens tightly to her body, "yes."
"Damnation," Adam got up from the bed angrily, "you couldn't have told me that before?"
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Sometimes love is the only cure for the very deepest of emotional wounds. The story of the two lovers takes a series of unexpected and fast paced turns where lives, sanity and love are put in jeopardy. Their commitment to one another results in a spirit that binds them together and helps them to overcome physical and emotional dangers.
Adam Sherman has remained quiet about his scandalous past and is comfortable with his reputation as a womanizing and dedicated bachelor. He is an expert in the field of computers including programming, networking and hacking. At twenty-five years old, he is content with his management job at a local Internet Provider. Davie Prescott is twenty years old and a college student who is working part-time at the same Internet Provider where Adam is employed. She was raised in a very close knit family of aunts, uncles and cousins. She and her widowed father are very close. Adam is attracted to Davie, but he shies away from her innocence because he feels his shameful past is too harsh for her existence. Adam finally shares his darkest secret with Davie and is amazed to find that she doesn´t turn away from him. When Adam' s past catches up to him, he soon learns that there´s a lot more at stake than just his nightmares. Adam is prepared to give Davie up if need be in order to protect her until he learns that she´s got a secret of her own. With Davie´s help, Adam learns a courage that is born of love, courage of the heart.
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12 comments:
Wow, oops! That was an awkward moment! I liked his response--it seemed so real. Great descriptive writing, Chelle. :-)
Wow he really didn't want to believe that's what she meant. I feel bad for her, he's not reacting well!
I feel sorry for her because the way he's responding isn't very encouraging! Whatever warmth was going on between them before she told him has totally evaporated - excellent excerpt, I'm very invested in learning what happens next.
Indicates some concern for her, at least.
Well written scene. His reaction is probably the usual when a guy finds out the naked woman he's in bed with is a virgin. Takes getting used to and way more care. Super eight, Chelle. So what happens next, we all wonder and that's a good thing.
Hmm, so he's not a complete ass that is about putting another notch in his belt. Seems like he could've been a bit kinder about it though...
It took him a while to catch on, didn't it? Given his past, innocence is probably another mark against her.
Hi all, thanks for coming by.
One might think that a womanizer, such as someone with Adam's rep might be considered, wouldn't mind another notch on his belt. Then again, some men consider it an honor to be a gal's first.
Hmmm, we will have to see why Adam'd reaction is as vehement as it is.
I wonder if he thinks he doesn't deserve the honor?
Hope he makes that clear soon, or this isn't gonna be a pretty argument! :)
Not exactly the response she was looking for I'm sure. Realistic scene.
Sarah W, you might be onto something? And for sure Karen this really wasn't what she expected.
pretty nice blog, following :)
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