Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior round. Every week writers post 8 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
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I'm introducing snippets from More Than a Friend, a part of The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero, a short-story collection which exemplifies (I hope) the diversity of my writing.
More Than a Friend is a short story based on a manuscript of the same name (which has never been published) This manuscript was co-authored by my sister, Barbara Cordero Du-Bois, and me. I re-wrote it as a short story because I wanted my characters to LIVE.
The following is from the opening scene:
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More Than a Friend is a short story based on a manuscript of the same name (which has never been published) This manuscript was co-authored by my sister, Barbara Cordero Du-Bois, and me. I re-wrote it as a short story because I wanted my characters to LIVE.
The following is from the opening scene:
“Are you doing okay?”
Janis couldn’t answer through the lump in her throat. She looked up at Jerry and nodded hesitantly.
He stifled a frustrated sigh, frustrated because he wanted to do something, anything, to take her pain away. It tore him open inside to see her tears and that angered him. Jerry felt guilty for the jealousy he felt knowing that she was crying over her loss of another man.
Janis stood in the center of her living room and remembered the last time she had been in that room with her husband… and wishing she could forget. There would never be another chance to make things right.
More Than a Friend
and share a lifetime together?
More Than a Friend
Can best friends become loversand share a lifetime together?
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The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero is a single author collection of short stories featuring Introduction, Pussycat Tails, Holiday Happiness, Not Alone, I Swear That Raccoon Just Knocked on the Door, Stormy Weather, A Mother’s Love, More Than a Friend, The Meeting, The Vacation and a special bonus section.
My apologies for not getting to many of your snippets last week. My son's wedding was magnificent and exhausting (in a good way). I posted a video of photos from the ceremony that a friend put together. theirs is a true love story of which I am certainly a fan.
Tonight (Sunday) is the 6th night of Hanukkah and just a few days before Christmas. It's a joyous time celebrating commitment, victory and faith. Just in time for the holidays is a Kindle book ~
My apologies for not getting to many of your snippets last week. My son's wedding was magnificent and exhausting (in a good way). I posted a video of photos from the ceremony that a friend put together. theirs is a true love story of which I am certainly a fan.
Tonight (Sunday) is the 6th night of Hanukkah and just a few days before Christmas. It's a joyous time celebrating commitment, victory and faith. Just in time for the holidays is a Kindle book ~
Holiday Happiness: A Short Story
I hope y'all are having a wonderful time and have completed your shopping without the maniac fervor that that always seems to be highly publicized this time of year. Enjoy your family get-together's and the neighbors' contagious happy spirits.
...and now I am going to get myself a Latka (potato pancake) - my husband makes the most delicious pancakes!
8 comments:
Interesting--the conflicted emotions. It's a very complex things and I think you've touched on it here.
Happy Chanukah, Chelle!
I'm touched by this eight and want to know what happened the moment before. Save a latka for me, dear Chelle.
I love the emotion and angst, especially in the last paragraph. If I had anything to suggest, it would be a revision of the paragraph in Jerry's POV to cut the repeated word felt and show more than tell. Sorta like this: It tore him open inside to see her tears, and to know she was crying over another man angered him. Guilt swamped his heart.
Great eight and I could totally go for a potato pancake right now. Your eight is so filled with emotion. I feel her pain in knowing that she can never go back and redo the things that have happened in her living room with her husband.
An intriguing and emotional opening. Great 8.
Merry Christmas!
Sad...but so well done, and definitely makes me want to keep reading. Great snippet!
That's a powerful snippet, Chelle! Well done!
Lots of emotion swirling through the room. Nice. I hope you and your family have a great Christmas.
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