Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior round. Every week writers post 8 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
Justin heads back home to tend to his mother (it's really more attention than need) and then returns to Layne's town as quickly as he can. Meanwhile Layne was disappointed that despite his promises to "be there" for Dennis, Justin just seemed to disappear. BTW, Justin's mom is upset that he left her again and Larry Davis, the family attorney, is angry when Justin won't listen to him and forget about Layne and Dennis.
In response to comments from last week: Justin's family owns a large chain of hardware stores and he comes from a more than comfortable upbringing. Larry is a long-time family friend and lawyer who is concerned with protecting the family's interests. With the early demise of Justin's twin brother and father and now his grandfather, Larry is left to guide Justin as he heads the family business. {this was all revealed between the posted snippets]
(the following has been edited to fit) ...and now the eight:
He
parked his car outside of the realty office where Layne worked and entered to
try pleading his case.
Layne
couldn't believe her eyes when she looked up and saw him walking in the door. He
came back. She had been so afraid that she was right about him in the beginning.
One of the agents walking past the door intercepted him; the agent probably
hoped he was moving into town and she'd be able to get a major commission.
He
responded to the inquiry, "I was hoping to have a word with Miss
Gillette."
The
agent showed him over to Layne's desk and then behind Justin's back gave Layne
a big smile and a thumbs-up.
"You're
back."
For more WeWriWa Snippets, go to:
About Common Bond, Tangled Hearts
Layne Gillette’s world is turned upside down when a man she has never met shows up to lay claim as the father of her 6-year old son.
Justin, the victim of a fraternity prank, and Layne, the subject of a forced insemination, have produced a beautiful child that they are both willing to protect… at all costs.
The two parents realize they can love each other, but when Layne’s abusive “ex-husband” shows up, they are torn apart by danger, kidnapping and lies. Justin won’t give up until Layne is returned to him. Layne uses her newfound strength, courage and knowledge to defy Charlie’s ugliest demands.
~~~~~~~~
Happy first day of summer and Happy Father's Day!
I guess it's appropriate to be highlighting snippets from
Common Bond, Tangled Hearts
a story of a man who discovers he is a father
I don't save thoughts about my mom or dad
(or my mother-in-law and father-in-law)
for just Mother's Day and Father's Day,
but it is nice to have a day to dedicate to them.
It's also a great time to be surrounded by our offspring
whether it's a Mother's Day Brunch
or a Father's Day Barbecue.
I wish joy and happiness to everyone
celebrating and reminiscing today.
Happy first day of summer and Happy Father's Day!
I guess it's appropriate to be highlighting snippets from
Common Bond, Tangled Hearts
a story of a man who discovers he is a father
I don't save thoughts about my mom or dad
(or my mother-in-law and father-in-law)
for just Mother's Day and Father's Day,
but it is nice to have a day to dedicate to them.
It's also a great time to be surrounded by our offspring
whether it's a Mother's Day Brunch
or a Father's Day Barbecue.
I wish joy and happiness to everyone
celebrating and reminiscing today.
14 comments:
I'm really liking this story, Chelle. :-) I'm glad he returned. He's got it bad for her--and for his son. Nicely done. :-)
two simple words--"You're back." How beautiful and touching.
I get why she's concerned, but he seems like an okay guy to me. Maybe she could give him a chance...
A lot of emotion in those last two words. Fabulous snippet. Well done:).
Of course he came back! We knew he would, even if she didn't. Poor Justin seems like he has a pack of people upset with him!
I really like this storyline. Very nicely done.
It seems she's had a change of heart about him.
Lots of emotion in this snippet, I'm glad he came back! Now to see what happens and how she will react to him. Also love the money hungry agent. Great job with setting the scene.
Love the story ... another great snippet.
Justin seems to be fighting for the right to live his life on his terms... and Layne just doesn't know him well enough to see that. I get the feeling I would not like Justin's mother though.
Oh yes, he's back. Maybe her heart is actually winning out over her mind and logic. I'd say if he's coming to plead his case to her and she didn't immediately shut him and tell him to leave, things might be looking up.
Well done.
Nice snippet.
This is a complicated situation but I'm glad he is not making excuses.
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