Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior round. Every week writers post 8 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
Justin calms Layne down, for now, and offers to drive her to work after they share a cup of coffee at the diner. He wants to find out more about Dennis... and Layne. We pick up during their conversation. This excerpt has been edited to fit.
...and now the
"You've
done a great job with him, Layne, I'd like to be a part of his life…"
"No,
that's not a good idea."
"I
already told you, I promise you I'm not going to try to take him away from you;
I'd be a fool to do that, he's too happy."
She
could barely look at him, "it would be too confusing."
"We
don't have to tell him I'm his father at least not until he's much older and
can understand." Justin realized what he had been missing for so long,
"I'll just be a family friend for now."
"I
don't want him getting attached to anyone." What if they had to hide
again?
"Layne,
why are you running?"
For more WeWriWa Snippets, go to:
About Common Bond, Tangled Hearts
Layne Gillette’s world is turned upside down when a man she has never met shows up to lay claim as the father of her 6-year old son.
Justin, the victim of a fraternity prank, and Layne, the subject of a forced insemination, have produced a beautiful child that they are both willing to protect… at all costs.
The two parents realize they can love each other, but when Layne’s abusive “ex-husband” shows up, they are torn apart by danger, kidnapping and lies. Justin won’t give up until Layne is returned to him. Layne uses her newfound strength, courage and knowledge to defy Charlie’s ugliest demands.
16 comments:
I don't know... Layne's evasiveness at this point could make me think that my son was in danger being with her, if I were in Justin's shoes. A lot of tension here.
There are a lot of reasons for her to ward him off . . .
This is still intriguing, Chelle! :)
Tension growing by the minute. And the big question is why is shy running? Terrific snippet, Chelle.
To me, it seems pretty sensible and obvious that she wouldn't simply let a stranger into her son's life.
I'd be careful too. How does she know that he isn't one of the people who are after her?
Fascinated by her thought that she might have to run again, very intriguing. And I can understand why she's reluctant to introduce her son to a stranger. Very realistic characters you've drawn. Another terrific excerpt!
He's just caught on to something important, I think. But will she trust him with the truth?
That is the big question, isn't it? Not that asking to be a part of his life isn't a big question too. You've packed a lot into a very short space. Nice going!
Well way to leave a cliffhanger! That line; "what if they had to hide again?" Perfection. Hook, line, and sinker. Now I want to know just what happened in her past. Who or what is she running from? I must know!
Great snippet!
Intriguing to say the least. I wonder why she's so hesitant ... great snippet.
Now that is one difficult situation right there. Hopefully they'll figure out how to make it work! Great work Chelle! Very real.
I can't wait to see how she answers that one!
Lots of questions in this snippet. You have me intrigued. What is she running from?
This is a good snippet. I'm glad she's calm enough to be rational about it all.Good snippet, Chelle!
forced insemination?? now Im really curious how that happens.
Oh, there seem to be a lot more going on than just an hidden child. Good! I like when it gets complicated.
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