Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior and Snippet Sunday round. Every week writers post 8-to-10 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
A long, long time ago I shared a few snippets from my Paranormal Romantic Suspense, Karma Visited (only 5) - and we didn't get a full taste of this story. Since I am working on a sequel and revisiting the story for myself, I'm sharing more with you and soaking up your comments.
Do you believe in karma? Annie Furman has a gift that allows her, while she sleeps, to visit people in their time of need - but who will be there for her when she needs help? Undersheriff Dave Turner is investigating a series of home invasions and homicides. He has no idea that solving this case will lead him to the woman of his dreams.
Creative editing alert! Here are eight lines...
Do you believe in karma? Annie Furman has a gift that allows her, while she sleeps, to visit people in their time of need - but who will be there for her when she needs help? Undersheriff Dave Turner is investigating a series of home invasions and homicides. He has no idea that solving this case will lead him to the woman of his dreams.
Creative editing alert! Here are eight lines...
Only two of the four desks were
currently occupied, his and his partner’s; two patrol cars were out in the
small town. Once upon a time he thought he had found heaven on earth, a nice
small town where he could continue his law enforcement career without all the
ugliness he saw as a detective in Chicago.
After eleven years he found himself
becoming apathetic and detached after dealing with junkies, abused wives who
kept going back to their husbands, missing kids that turned up dead on the side
of a road, hookers who were terrified of disappointing their pimps, thieves and
arsonists. His indifference became a way of life even when he wasn’t at the
job.
Indifference destroyed his marriage
too, although he had come to realize that while he missed the idea of being
married, he certainly didn’t miss the woman he was married to. She had done him
a favor the day she got fed up, Rose walked out and never looked back. He
didn’t have much of a chance to miss her or feel guilty for long, not the way
she had her lawyer come after him. She wound up keeping most of what he used to
own and it made leaving his old life behind a lot easier.
For more WeWriWa Snippets, go to:
My life changed after I died.
It’s not like I had any special powers.
They just didn’t understand me.
They underestimated me.
I had a gift.
~~~~~
Did you check out a NEW feature I am trying on this blog?
Every Wednesday I am going to post a random picture I find online
(and yes, I will make sure not to violate any copyrights)
and I will ask everyone to contribute to a "story" by adding a
sentence in the comments.
We'll see how much interest this fun post gets
Come back every Wednesday and play along
then come back and read the comments
Here's the first random pic
~~~~~
21 comments:
Ouch! Poor guy, sounds like a rough divorce, but maybe one for the better? Of course, not in the short run I'd say, but the long run could hold potential. Still, it's hard to just leave a whole life behind and start over.
That sounds like a really pathetic life to live. I can understand that his empathy disappeared at some point but a life without emotion isn't really a life.
Since this post is about kharma, may I assume he's done some truly rotten stuff in a former life? (Actually, I'm pretty sure that ISN"T why you brought up kharma...) ;-)
Nice insight into his life. Sounds like an interesting story already.
So real Chelle. The slippery slope to hell on earth. Hope he gets his 'wonder' back.
So real Chelle. The slippery slope to hell on earth. Hope he gets his 'wonder' back.
Down on his luck, and getting beat even farther with every moment...sounds like a rough life. Hope things turn around for him. Good snippet.
Isn't it sad how indifference can leech into a person's whole life. Great snippet, Chelle.
Beautiful insight into his life. You've painted a terrific picture here of sorrow and disillusion. No way to go but up!
At least he sees the blessings available to him. Good snippet, Chelle.
It sounds like he has a healthy mindset for a fresh start. Really drew me in!
Wow, his life is kind of bleak but I can imagine when he only sees the ugly underside of life it's hard to stay positive. Really a compelling snippet and left me feeling I know this guy.
Sounds like he needed a better divorce attorney. I hope something happens to turn around his jaded attitude -- that's no way to live.
You know, usually I find long passages of narrative a bit boring, but this one pulled me in and held my interest throughout. I guess it's because I empathized with him on everything. Great snippet!
~Joyce Scarbrough
Oh my, his ex doesn't sound very friendly. Great snippet that tells the reader a lot about Dave.
Great intro to what sounds like a jaded character.
Fantastic character building, Chelle. He's got a lot to overcome...
Sounds like he's had a rough time of it.
He sounds ripe for some intervention! That's definitely a life that could use a little perking up.
This is a very well-written bit of character study. You get all of the pertinent information in with plenty of hooks for plotlines to build...
Great snippet. Poor guy but it sounds like he's better off.
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