Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior and Snippet Sunday round. Every week writers post 8-to-10 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
A long, long time ago I shared a few snippets from my Paranormal Romantic Suspense, Karma Visited (only 5) - and we didn't get a full taste of this . Since I am working on a sequel and revisiting the story for myself, I'm sharing more with you and soaking up your comments.
Do you believe in karma? Annie Furman has a gift that allows her, while she sleeps, to visit people in their time of need - but who will be there for her when she needs help? Undersheriff Dave Turner is investigating a series of home invasions and homicides. He has no idea that solving this case will lead him to the woman of his dreams.
We are still in Annie's dream in Dave's living room. They've shared alot about the threat Annie has been living with. Dave offers to help her but she is afraid that will only make things worse. (I'm probably only going to share two more times from Karma Visited)
Creative editing (condensed to fit) alert! Here are Eight lines...
“You said you needed to disappear, does
that mean I’ll never get to see you again?” Dave fidgeted uncomfortably, “this
is only the second time I’ve talked with you but something tells me I really
want to get to know you better, I haven’t stopped thinking about you since the
other night.”
Annie chuckled, “I think maybe you
couldn’t stop thinking about me just because no one else could see me.”
“Yeah, well, there was that,” he
grinned, “are you able to come here whenever you want?”
“I don’t know, it worked this time,
somehow.” Annie suddenly looked scared, “I’ve got to go.”
“Wait, when will I see you again?”
She was gone.
~~~~~
For more WeWriWa Snippets, go to:
My life changed after I died.
It’s not like I had any special powers.
They just didn’t understand me.
They underestimated me.
I had a gift.
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~~~~~
21 comments:
Excellent hook, Chelle.
I don't like the sound of her having to go like that.
Having said that, the chemistry between Annie and Dave is building nicely.
Great snippet, Chelle. Teases the curiosity - both his and ours.
I see they're going to have a frustrating time!
I hope she didn't have to leave for a bad reason This is going to drive him crazy!
Ack--what made her leave like that! Hurry up next Sunday!
~Joyce Scarbrough
I love Dave and Annie and I agree with the others - you're building the tension and the connection between them SO nicely! Great snippet. Happy there's going to be a sequel!
Poor guy. Did she have to go just when things were getting interesting???
What an ending to a beautiful moment. . .or is it? See you next week.
Aww, I hope she finds her way back to him. He seems so sincere!
Not good that she has to leave so suddenly. I hope she's okay. Great snippet! :)
I wonder what scared her while she was asleep and dreaming?
I wonder why she left so suddenly? Is she in trouble?
Oh, getting even cuter! I hope they will be able to see each other again.
I'm afraid to know what interrupted their connection or who...
Just when things were peaking! Good hook! Can't wait to see what happens next!
Her husband, I bet/fear?
Just when the conversation was getting interesting... She's going to have to trust him--I think she'll need some help to get away from her situation.
Classic last lines! I wonder what made her so scared so suddenly. Her husband? Him wanting to know her better? I hope she sees him again and lets him help her. Really enjoying this story.
oh ... nice last line. great snippet.
Oh, poor Dave. I hope they meet again soon. And I wonder, why she has to go so urgently.
I wonder what scared her so much that she had to go so fast.
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