I Say Po-TAY-To, You Say Po-TAH-To

The original title of this week’s blog post was going to be “The Dumbing Down of the English Language” but then after an interesting discussion I was reminded that we each look at things from different perspectives. (The discussion was on Facebook of course, where else during these days of social distancing do you have the chance to discuss topics with such passion?)

There was a recent article about Houston realtors wanting to formally drop the term “Master”, such as in suite, bedroom, bathroom, etc. from their listings and replacing the term with “Principle”. I immediately thought of the bathroom unit attached to the bedroom my husband and I use; when we bought this house the description called it the Master Suite (aka the Master Bedroom and the Master Bath) and these two units take up one entire side of our home. The other side of our house has two more bedrooms (which we use as a den/office and a guest room) and the Main Bathroom. My first inane thought was how confusing it would be to say the Main Bathroom and the Principle Bathroom! Then of course I started thinking of all the places we could replace the word “Master” — Master’s Degree, Master Chef, Masterpiece, and (sorry) Masturbate…

Then I went on the read the article and learned the reasoning behind the change and I truly felt some guilt for making fun of it. It is the belief that America’s descendants of slaves associate the term Master with their history of slavery and having to serve AND BE OWNED by often cruel Masters. While some part of me still sees no need for the exclusion of the word from realtor listings, another part of me feels a little guilty for not immediately understanding and being sensitive. After reading the explanations and the descriptions of slaves who were both brought here against their will and then subjugated, actually bought and sold, and OWNED by MASTERS, I understand now my need to be sensitive to the horrors and possible triggers of this and other terms.

It isn’t that I wasn’t thinking, I just didn’t understand the perspective that descendants of people who were OWNED and subservient had. I will try better to understand the views, associations, and pain that such terms cause. And if indeed the word is struck from general use then it is my goal to accept it fully. In the end it is all about perspective and it sometimes blurs the right and wrong, but once it’s been pointed out we need to be more considerate of each other.

A Whole New World

The world has seen catastrophes before, but the COVID-19 crisis has shaken us, filled many of us with fear, despair, and loss. This latest strain of the Corona Virus has caused a worldwide pandemic with more than 200-thousand deaths and nearly 3-million confirmed cases. In the United States alone we’ve lost over 52-thousand people and have more than a million confirmed cases.

Many American families have sheltered in place, schools are closed and many businesses shuttered (at least for now). The emotional toll of isolation, the insecurity of an income to pay day-to-day bills, and the surreal recordings of precautions intermingled with encouragement in the grocery stores have left scars on our psyche. Essential workers often keep themselves away from their spouses and children to ensure they don’t bring the virus through their own front doors. First responders such EMTs and Paramedics, Firefighters, Police Officers, and healthcare workers like nurses and doctors are overworked, overstressed, getting sick themselves and sometimes desperate to see an end even if it means taking their own precious lives.

If you or someone you know is in crisis, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Lifeline) at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or text the Crisis Text Line (text HELLO to 741741). Both services are free and available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The deaf and hard of hearing can contact the Lifeline via TTY at 1-800-799-4889. All calls are confidential.

As bleak as it may seem, we are hoping for some light — The National Institutes of Health are coordinating worldwide research on both the treatment and development of a vaccine to fight COVID-19. Scientists and doctors are collaborating and combining research and statistics to find the best defense against this disease. Across the United States there are many reports of “the flattening curve” that show that #StayAtHome, Social Distancing, and the use of masks and gloves are helping. There are encouraging news reports about the human spirit, about helping to feed each other, applauding the efforts of essential workers, and families finding ways to stay in touch through the internet and phone lines. Several states are beginning to SLOWLY and CAUTIOUSLY open their businesses and other resources while monitoring all results and asking folks to continue using personal protective equipment and social distancing.

Many of us have become stronger, we’ve developed more interaction within our households, and we’ve found creative ways to keep on living as normally as possible. Teachers have stepped up to continue teaching their students through emails, video-chats and even singing drive-bys. Mom or Dad, or both, have stayed connected and learned to work from home. Several doctors have made use of telemedicine to check in on patients without any exposure to possible contaminants. Some of our leaders have stepped up to keep us informed with accurate facts, guidance and useful information to help our families through these days.

The world has changed and I doubt it will ever go back to the way it was before. Many of us will have learned a new respect for ALL of our essential workers, a respect that hopefully will stick with us even in better times. There will come a day when we can “hug” our loved ones that we haven’t seen for months, but we will also be more aware of safe practices with every contact.

Things WILL improve, but for now we all need to do our part. Even if you are allowed to return to work as we open our states again, keep that social distancing and personal protective gear in play. Continue frequent hand washing, sneeze into your elbow or tissues which you can properly dispose of, and keep wiping down surfaces that are frequently touched. Do it all now and help to flatten the curve, and do it later to remain healthy and strong.

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I wish you all health, happiness and the (soon) ability to spend time with family and friends.

Do Overs ~ #MondayBlogs

How often have we all thought if we could only do something over would we have done things differently? I am thrilled with the life I have and I know that the things I did and decided have led me to where I am today. Once in a while though I do wonder what if… what if I hadn’t gone to the college I did, what if I had gotten a job with the NYPD, what if I had continued pursuing a theatrical career. When a movie gets remade, we still have the option of watching the original version again —

Ghostbusters 1986-style is a part of my (younger) life and it was funny and I enjoyed it. I laughed at the lines and facial expressions made by Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Sigourney Weaver, Harold Ramis, Rick Moranis, Annie Potts, and Ernie Hudson. I don’t know if I want to see someone else fighting the ghostly invasion of NYC. Will the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man make an appearance again?

But I am sort of interested in the new release, I really like the actresses now playing the parts, Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig, and Kate McKinnon, and I am super excited to learn that both Ernie Hudson and Sigourney Weaver will make appearances. I guess it never phased me about an all-male team versus the all-female ghost fighters but that seems to be a big publicity item about this new version. I wonder how else the movie format will change. The original movie was filmed in areas of NYC while the new version, even though the plot is centered in Manhattan, actually features scenes from Boston.

There have been several other movie remakes. In some cases the new technology available has made scenes more fantastic and memorable; sometimes the actors cast in one of the versions is better than the other. Have you seen (original and remake): War of the Worlds; The Thing; The Manchurian Candidate; The Parent Trap; King Kong; The Fly; Hairspray; or True Grit? Were you disappointed in the remakes? Be honest, how many of these remakes made you rush right back to the original version?

Maybe it’s a good thing we really don’t get to do our lives over, we might not like the new version as much as the original. Unlike the movies we wouldn’t have Netflix to find the original preferred version again. How many things might be different in your life? How much of that might you miss the second time around?

Who ya' gonna call if you had to do your life over again?

Changes ~ #MondayBlogs

Sunrise, sunset
Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly fly the years
One season following another
Laden with happiness and tears
(from Fiddler on the Roof)

Life seems to change so rapidly, every day presents new experiences and opportunities. Our married daughter and her husband moved out-of-state last year (not far thankfully), our son is getting married the end of this year, and hubby and I (AND the cats) are thinking of downsizing.

Yikes, to think of packing up a home that we’ve been in for more than three decades is monumental! And yet despite my aversion to cleaning, throwing out the excess, and packing dozens of boxes, the thought of moving on with my husband of nearly 40-years is attractive. I’m entertaining myself with dreams of having an idyllic empty-nester dream home. I admit there is more than a bit of sentimentality about the idea of leaving this home where we raised our family…

Right now it’s a dream, a vision, a plan, but it is definitely one we are heading towards with no specific timetable. Just one of the adventures we look forward to in this ever-changing world.

Moonstruck

44 years ago on July 20, 1969, Apollo 11 astronauts Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin became the first humans to set foot on the moon.

I remember how excited we all were that day - my parents, sister and I had just returned home, not sure I remember where we had been. The living room TV wasn't working and we all piled into my parent's bedroom to watch the events unfold on a 12-inch black & white television screen. I can remember how we cheered at Armstrong's immortal words "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind."

It was then that I looked at my parents' faces and saw the wonder and awe, the world that they had been born into was forever changed once again. A human being had actually set foot on an icon that, until then, was only the source of romantic songs and sci-fi stories.

As a writer I am constantly aware that the world is changing daily. Everyday household chores, travel, communications, politics, fashions, medicine... just a few of the things that have changed since I was a kid. My grown children look at me with amused expressions when I talk of a time when no one traveled in space, we didn't use computers to do our homework, when the phone rang and you either answered it or didn't, we didn't have cell phones, caller ID, or Skype, a time when the only way to be immune to Chicken Pox was to suffer through a bout.

In Final Sin, Jake proposes to Julie despite qualms about the age difference and not having known each other that long - he explains his feelings to her friend Matt, "You know, after nine-eleven, everybody seemed to know somebody who lost someone, and I just didn't want to wait forever to ask. I never expected to need someone so much ever again".

(When I wrote that I thought about when my own husband proposed to me in 1974, a time when the Twin Towers being attacked was unfathomable, most of us were still adjusting to the iconic structures as part of the NYC skyline.)

But I digress...

We now live in a world where reaching for the stars isn't just an expression - it's reality. Today this blog post is a salute to the brave dreamers who truly went where no man has gone before, thank you Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Mike Collins and all the men and women who made that great journey into space.