Saturday, August 29, 2015

A Promise is Made

Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior round. Every week writers post 8 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.

See more at the
WeWriWa blog

& check out the
Facebook Snippet Sunday group


My entry this week is from Common Bond, Tangled Hearts. Layne Gillette’s world is turned upside down when a man she has never met shows up to lay claim as the father of her 6-year old son. 

Justin tells Layne that he's developed feelings for her and assures her that he will do whatever he can to protect her and Dennis. He reminds her that he has money and power to stand up against Charlie; this worries Layne because those are the very things Charlie held over her. Justin promises to take care of them both.

  (the following has been edited to fit)  ...and now the eight nine:

"Justin, I care for you, I really do, and what you're saying to me sounds really wonderful, but I don't want you making promises."

"I won't let you down, Layne, and I won't let Dennis down, I do promise, trust me."

He kissed her again, he gave her a gentle push until she was lying down, his weight partly covering her, his tongue exploring her mouth.

"Justin... what are you doing to my mommy?"

Dennis was kneeling on all fours watching them.

"Uh, I was giving your mom a kiss."

Dennis looked at his mother and then at Justin, "Are you my mommy's boyfriend?"

Layne looked surprised at his question.

Justin merely smiled, "I hope so."




For more WeWriWa Snippets, go to: 


About Common Bond, Tangled Hearts

Layne Gillette’s world is turned upside down when a man she has never met shows up to lay claim as the father of her 6-year old son.
Justin, the victim of a fraternity prank, and Layne, the subject of a forced insemination, have produced a beautiful child that they are both willing to protect… at all costs.
The two parents realize they can love each other, but when Layne’s abusive “ex-husband” shows up, they are torn apart by danger, kidnapping and lies. Justin won’t give up until Layne is returned to him. Layne uses her newfound strength, courage and knowledge to defy Charlie’s ugliest demands.




    ~~~~~~~~

20 comments:

Ed Hoornaert said...

Considering the compromising position he has her in, I'd say he's definitely about to become her boyfriend. ;-)

Kim Magennis said...

Children are a good way to create tension, add the unexpected, and break a situation down. Nicely done.

Kim Magennis said...

Children are a good way to create tension, add the unexpected, and break a situation down. Nicely done.

Charmaine Gordon said...

Enter the kid. I do love this scene.And what happens next ,Mommy?

Paula Millhouse said...

OOps! Busted by the kiddo. Well, what is she gonna say now?

gemma parkes said...

Aw, what a sweet scene! Time to get a babysitter!

tinachristopherauthor.com said...

Lol, talk about putting a dampener on things. Sweet scene and I agree with Gemma, time to get a babysitter;). Great snippet.

Jennifer Reynolds said...

Too cute on both ends. Great snippet. :)

Veronica Scott said...

Good answer to the little boy, enjoying the story, can't wait for more!

Karen Michelle Nutt said...

So sweet. Leave it to the child to voice what he sees and wants.

P.T.Wyant said...

Justin hopes so, but I wonder what Layne's answer to the question would be.

Caitlin Stern said...

She's going to have to learn to trust him, but I bet it will take some proving on his part.

Allyson Carter said...

*Sigh* I love this scene. I bet it takes her time to trust.

Elaine Cantrell said...

Uh oh. Not a good time for an interruption.

Linda said...

Hahaha, good timing! I love that innocent question and sneaky answer.

Chelle Cordero said...

I guess that anyone who has heard the words "Whatcha' doing?" in your child's voice at that MOST inopportune moment would chuckle at this, LOL. Thanks all for your comments.

Iris Blobel said...

I like his reply. This could've gone wrong in so many ways :-) well done.

diannehartsock said...

A very sweet snippet! Nice.

dmorgana said...

Perfect response from him. Kids are so innocent, and blunt, they can get away with asking and saying anything. They make interesting characters.

JTsuruoka said...

This is a very sweet scene-- it's easy to get into the heads of all of the characters involved. A well-captured slice of life!