Saturday, October 10, 2015

Trying to keep a brave face on - Weekend Writing Warriors / #8sunday / 10/11/15

Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior and Snippet Sunday round. Every week writers post 8-to-10 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.

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My entry this week is from Common Bond, Tangled Hearts. Layne Gillette’s world is turned upside down when a man she has never met shows up to lay claim as the father of her 6-year old son. 

A scene switch follows Justin's frustration at the police station. We're picking up a few lines later; Layne and her son Dennis are in the back of a limo headed into Philadelphia where Charlie lives

  (the following has been edited to fit)  ...and now the eight nine ten:

"Mommy, why are you crying?"

Layne told her son that they were going to live with an old friend of hers in a big house with lots of good things around them; she was trying very hard not to let him feel the same loss and fear that she was feeling.

"Will Justin come to visit?"

"N... no, I don't think he'll be able to, but I'm sure he'll be thinking about you a whole lot."

She was shattered; she knew she'd never again see Justin. When they threatened to give Justin a lethal injection on top of the one that already had him unconscious, Layne would have given up her own safety, even her own life, if it had just been her, but she had Dennis to think about.

"I want Justin to visit me," Dennis whined. "Can I call him and ask?"

"We'll have to see," she knew Charlie would never allow that.

Layne hadn't been back there since the evening Charlie took her to the doctor, she had hoped she'd never have to return.

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About Common Bond, Tangled Hearts

Layne Gillette’s world is turned upside down when a man she has never met shows up to lay claim as the father of her 6-year old son.
Justin, the victim of a fraternity prank, and Layne, the subject of a forced insemination, have produced a beautiful child that they are both willing to protect… at all costs.
The two parents realize they can love each other, but when Layne’s abusive “ex-husband” shows up, they are torn apart by danger, kidnapping and lies. Justin won’t give up until Layne is returned to him. Layne uses her newfound strength, courage and knowledge to defy Charlie’s ugliest demands.


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Vanilla Heart Publishing Fall Catalog 2015 contains direct live links for Audiobooks, Print Editions, and Ebook Editions currently available, by Chelle Cordero, Lauren Shiro, Malcolm R. Campbell, Charmaine Gordon, Angela Kay Austin, Tamara Philip, Neva Squires-Rodriguez, Gwendolyn Jensen-Woodard, and Paul Zunckel. PLUS links to Chelle Cordero's books on Writing and the Business of Being a Writer, and a special tribute collection on Domestic Violence and Survivors by Namid.


Teresa Cypher said...

You've set this up so well, Chelle! From snippets alone, I'm invested in these characters. Nicely done!

PT said...

"...she had hoped she'd never have to return." Love that line!

Unknown said...

Awe, poor Dennis. It's amazing the fronts we put on for our children so they will not see the trouble/sadness/etc. in the air. Great work. I am really enjoying getting to know your characters.

Charmaine Gordon said...

The incredible sad situation you've drawn is remarkable. I picture other woman in this situation. How awful for them and how fortunate we are. And now dear readers we have a cliffhanger here.

Siobhan Muir said...

What a heartbreaking place to be - wanting to give your kid what they want, and yet not being able to fully explain why you can't. Good snippet, Chelle. :)

Veronica Scott said...

A terrifying situation all the way around. This novel just keeps winding tighter and tighter - excellent excerpt.

Unknown said...

Not that we didn't already know Charlie was a real prize, but wow . . . that's special.

Elaine Cantrell said...

I'd like to show Charlie the error of his ways. You've created a lovely villain.

diannehartsock said...

Very intense scene! I hope things will work out for her.

Iris B said...

Oh, I have to catch up on the few weeks I've missed. I'm intrigued about what's happened.

JTsuruoka said...

Rough stuff, and very well-handled. This could so easily be an over-wrought scene but it comes off just right.

Anonymous said...

Oh my heart aches for her... Well done on portraying the hopelessness and despair she feels at this. Her devotion and care for Justin and her son shows through strongly. Very well done. But I sure hope Justin finds them and kicks Charlie's ass before he can hurt Layne.