Saturday, March 5, 2016

This one will shock them ~ Weekend Writing Warriors / #8sunday / 03/06/16

Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior and Snippet Sunday round. Every week writers post 8-to-10 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.

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I am sharing snippets from a new short story I wrote, Always One More Time. This story has just been released in a terrific anthology called HeartWorks ~ Eight Great Stories of Love, Passion, and Romance from Vanilla Heart Publishing Authors Charmaine Gordon, Paul Zunckel, Chelle Cordero, Neva Squires-Rodriguez, Lauren Shiro, Tamara Philip, Gwendolyn Jensen-Woodard, and Angela Kay Austin.

Last week Callie told the Bernerd family that Jimmy proposed to her in a letter. This week she tells them the real reason she showed up at the Bernerd homestead. This is the final ten sentence snippet for this story.

Creative editing alert!  Here are ten lines... 

The older woman calmly smiled and took Callie’s hand again, “My Jimmy was a fine boy and it’s nice to know that he was loved.” She sighed, “But child, Jimmy is gone and you did not get married.” She stood, still holding Callie’s hand, “Thank you so much for letting us know that you cared for him.”
Realizing that she was being dismissed, Callie stayed seated, “I needed to talk with you.”
Lawrence guffawed, “This alleged proposal means nothing if you think you’re entitled to his benefits.”
Callie turned to Lawrence, “That’s not what I came for.”
Sighing, the mother sat down again, “Then why did you come?”
“I came for family, we have a son.”
Mrs. Bernerd put a hand to her chest, “I have a grandbaby?”
“Yes, his name is Jacob.”

just a hint: Not all arms welcome Callie and Jacob...
For more WeWriWa Snippets, go to: 

Have enough courage to trust love
one more time.
And always, one more time.

Maya Angelo

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Iris B said...

“My Jimmy was a fine boy and it’s nice to know that he was loved.” this is always wonderful to know ... nice snippet.

Anonymous said...

Considering the welcome she received, this news is fraught with grief and dramatic possibilities.

Teresa Cypher said...

Wow--such emotion! I could visualize this scene, Chelle! Great premise!

Kim M said...

Oh my, Chelle. What a bombshell to drop.

T. M. Hunter said...

Definitely a huge twist...hope she's able to find a way to persuade them all to love her and the grandbaby in the end.

Charmaine Gordon said...

Beautiful story, Chelle, so worth reading. If only people realized racism is caustic. Love is what counts.

Unknown said...

EEk. Bombshell moment. I wonder if Jimmy's family will be more accepting of her now?

The Belle in Blue said...

Not sure why, but I totally didn't see that coming! This really sets up a complicated, tension-filled story. Great job!

~Joyce Scarbrough

PT said...

I was close. I was expecting her to be pregnant, not already have a child. (And right now, I'm feeling sorry for Jacob, given the aunt and uncle he has.)

Jennifer said...

I knew she was going to say something like. Great way to take his family by surprise. :)

Veronica Scott said...

Not unexpected certainly but still quite the moment! Great excerpt.

Siobhan Muir said...

The plot thickens. Suddenly there are more connections than they thought. Good snippet, Chelle. :)

Unknown said...

This family isn't going to be great to be a part of, without the father.

Bonnie said...

Oh my! What a surprise. I can't wait to see their reaction

JTsuruoka said...

Well then. Cue the sound of the needle scraping on the record as it comes to a sudden stop. This conversation is not going the way Jimmy's folks thought...

Karen Michelle Nutt said...

That had to be a surprise. Hopefully a welcomed one.

Linda said...

So that's what it was! Though I wonder why Jimmy didn't tell his family himself that he had a pregnant girlfriend.

Unknown said...

Wow! So intrigued! It's on my TBR list because I want to know more. Great snippet!

E.D. Martin said...

Son has a child with a woman his parents don't seem to care for - I'm anticipating lots of drama still to come.

Anonymous said...

Plot twist! I was expecting her to say pregnant, not already having a son. I have one dilemma though, when did they manage to see each other for her to conceive? Or will we find that out soon?