April Fool’s Day

I never did like April Fool’s Day pranks. My friends, and even some family, always made fun of me for that. But all I saw was cruelty and disappointment.

I saw people who had money problems being told “Omigosh, it’s a winning lottery ticket!” and then their tears of joy changed to forlorn disappointment when they realized it was just a prank. I watched as insecure children were ignored as their classmates pretended not to see them as an April Fools prank and they did their best not to cry. And I’ve seen people thinking they had been given a loving gift only to open an empty box and then being laughed at for their disappointment.

Call me a grouch if you want, but the very name of the day implies a meanness – you go out of your way to make a FOOL of someone. Why? Isn’t it belittling? Yes there are comics who strive to make us laugh and they often don’t mind making themselves the center of a joke. Often we tease each other, lightheartedly and certainly with no malice. But is there really a need to scare the wits out of someone just to give yourselves a thrill? Do you really want to give someone a heart attack? Or do you really want to give them a chance to throw it right back at you and play dead until you are filled with terrible remorse?

Yes there are surprises and reactions, many times unintended, that make us laugh but not at the expense of each other. No one needs to make someone feel cheated or betrayed. No one needs to feel that they were made a fool of. There are certainly some harmless pranks and most of us can survive and even laugh like the fake snake jumping out of a can of peanuts. But there are those that have to think of ways to pull the “ultimate” prank and wind up doing harm instead. My dad was quite a prankster and some of his jokes still make me laugh, but none of those jokes were ever designed to hurt my sister or me or our feelings, and for young children feelings got damaged a lot worse than bumps and bruises.

At the risk of giving some ideas, some of the cruelest and possibly most dangerous pranks include “Ex-Lax” in a box of chocolate, hot pepper sauce in the ketchup bottle, a bug in a lunch sandwich (even worse if it’s fake and you can choke on it), a missing step, a loosened bike handlebars, an exploding ink pen that ruins a favorite outfit… Why? So yeah, I’m a grumbler about the so-called April Fool’s Day pranks because I’ve seen some of the damage some of these so-called jokes can do. And yes I was the victim of one so bad I was seriously injured (handlebars), so while I never liked the pranks before I HATED them after. Maybe the best way to surprise someone this April Fool’s Day is to do something unexpectedly nice.

No one really knows why April Fool’s Day was created. Some say it had to do with the creation of the modern day calendar and confusion as to when the New Year officially began and so, for this unknown reason folks have perpetuated this day… and maybe that is the greatest joke of them all.

Happy 2020!

So it’s a New Year (in the Gregorian calendar) and aside from all the jokes about having terrific vision this year (2020 eyesight and all that), it is, like all New Year celebrations, another NEW beginning; I wrote about new beginnings this past October.

So what makes THIS new beginning different from all other New Year events? Well for one this New Year is based on the Gregorian calendar and seems to be more universal, most times even people who observe religious and ethnic based festivities also celebrate the coming of January 1. The Gregorian calendar is accepted as the most widely used calendar as it most closely represents the Earth’s spin around the Sun.

Most of us will probably, as in many years past, need a while to get used to writing the “2020” in our checkbooks and other correspondence. Luckily for those of us who make use of EFT (electronic fund transfers) through our online banking apps will send our check payments out with the correct date thanks to the computerized systems. But snail-mailed greeting cards and letters, for those few still doing that, will provide enough challenge, lol.

Here’s some fun facts about the year 2020: It’s a leap year since it is divisible by four (4), which means that there are 366 days instead of the usual 365 — this allows for the approximately one-quarter extra day per year that the Earth moves around the Sun, or exactly 365 days 5 hours 48 minutes and 46 seconds. This year February 29 is a thing! By the way did you know that the turn-of-the-century years, even though still divisible by four, are NOT leap years? This is because years that are equally divisible by 100 are excluded… I have no idea why.

October 2020 will make the 438^th anniversary of the Gregorian calendar, its predecessor was the Julian calendar (named for Julius Caesar). The Gregorian calendar was named for its creator, Pope Gregory XIII (with the assistance of undisclosed and uncelebrated astronomers). It seems that the approximately 11 minutes per year that the Julian calendar did not take into account threw the observance dates of certain Christian holidays askew. The new Gregorian calendar specifically allows for 365-days per year with an extra day every year divisible by four (February 29), and centuries divisible by 400 (otherwise years divisible by 100 are excluded).

Whew, I am glad I didn’t have to do the math!

Most people still make resolutions, ideas of things to better themselves, every New Year. And then most people break those well-meaning resolutions after only a few weeks (if they are that lucky to last that long). The new concept recommended by therapists and life-guides is to set goals WITH plans of how to reach those goals so that we each have a “road-map” to guide us. Part of reaching January is to let go of the past year — that doesn’t mean forgetting! Build on what happened last year, it taught you lessons, maybe you met new people, maybe you lost someone dear, but it was a definite part of making YOU. Let go of the disappointments, know that you have a chance to re-do most of what you didn’t manage in the year before.

Perhaps that fact that this year is 2020 and allows for all the jokes about vision is a sign… It’s a new year, and a new time to evaluate ourselves and work towards doing better. It’s a time for us to treasure our friendships especially those that have traveled the many years with us. Be sure to celebrate the person you’ve become, you reached this day, this year and this new opportunity.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Happy New Year!

Many of us are not used to hearing those words except at the beginning of January, but there are some cultures who celebrate the changing of our calendar years at different times. Some of these are the Chinese New Year which corresponds to the Lunar months; the Islamic New Year beginning on the first day of the first month in the Islamic calendar beginning in late Autumn; the Thai New Year is a springtime celebration; the Ethiopian New Year is a spring celebration which comes after the “big Rains”; and the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah through Yom Kippur in the fall. The December 31^st and January 1 New Year’s celebration is based on the Gregorian 12-month calendar.

Although each of these merriments may be celebrated in unique ways, they all represent a new beginning. Before January 1st in America many of us make a list of resolutions, things we want to do in the coming year to improve ourselves. Those of us who celebrate Rosh Hashanah ask for forgiveness from those we may have unintentionally hurt, forgive those who hurt us, and we promise to do better in the future; the ten days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are known as the ten days of repentance or the ten days of return. Some of us are lucky enough to be able to celebrate more than one new beginning every “year”, but how many of us truly realize how special an opportunity we are given.

There are several greetings we use for Rosh Hashana, my favorite two are Shanah Tovah Umetukah (wishing you a good and sweet new year) and L’Shanah Tovah Tikatevu (may you be inscribed in the book of life). Those who are lucky enough to be surrounded by family and friends often share feasts of good food and sweet delicacies to hopefully signify a good and sweet year. We say blessings over wine or grape juice thanking G-d for giving us the fruit of the vine, and we dip pieces of round challah (bread) and apples in honey thanking HIM for the fruit of the earth and sweetness. We use round uncut challahs instead of the usual twisted versions to symbolize the cycle of life. We listen to the sound of the Ram’s Horn (the Shofar), light candles and read from parts of the Torah as we are commanded to do by G-d. It is often believed that the Shofar arouses us to examine our deeds and renew our relationship with G-d.

 The time between the eve of Rosh Hashanah (Jewish holidays always begin the evening before at sunset) and the end of Yom Kippur allows us time to reflect on our deeds. No one, not even G-d, expects us to be perfect, but we are always expected to strive to do better. These ten days allows us the time to examine our deeds, to be repentant for our misdeeds, intended or not, and allows us to find the peace within us to forgive those who have dealt unfair blows in our lives. The “Book of Life” opens on Rosh Hashanah, this “book” contains pages for each of us and G-d examines what has been written by our “own hands” (our own deeds). G-d judges and decides, by the time the book is closed on Yom Kippur, “who will live and who will die”. Despite the gravity of the words in our prayers, this is really not a frightening time, rather it is a time in which we find peace and self-awareness. We promise to do better, it is not the promise that is weighed by G-d but the sincerity in which we mean it.

Whatever time you may use for self-reflection and whatever belief system you subscribe to, the time you have to truly look inside yourself, to make peace with others and to plan how you can live a happier and better life is a precious thing indeed.

May your new year be sweet with hope
and new possibilities.
Wherever you go...blessings. Wherever you look...beauty.
Wherever you are...peace. L'Shanah Tovah

A Time for Resolutions — #MondayBlogs

The first week of a new year and of course everyone is doing it, making their resolutions OR declaring that they aren’t making resolutions. Some people are discouraged that they dropped last year’s resolutions long before any made a difference in their lives; sometimes that’s a repeated pattern year-after-year until the person simply decides to give up and doesn’t even try.

Alleged experts say that “independent surveys” have shown that only about 40-percent of resolutions are still being “kept” after three months. So why is this failure (for lack of a better word) rate so high? I would imagine that most people want some kind of improvement in their lives and making a decision that could positively affect them sounds like a good idea.

I’m making a few resolutions, but I am not stopping there. Make your list of resolutions; these should be things that YOU would like to see come to be in your life, if you don’t care you won’t make the effort. Now let’s say you have five to ten items on your list, do it like an outline with each resolution being numbered. Under each resolution list the things you have to do in order for that resolution to happen. Under each “project” set a timeline and/or a date it should be done by. Steps and timelines make up your goals and are tangible things you can actually achieve. Remember to keep these resolutions and dates realistic.

For instance, one of my resolutions this year (as in previous years) is to make more money, so that would be number one. What steps am I going to take to make this resolution happen? If I put (under sub-topic A) win the lottery, that is an unrealistic step because while it COULD happen (hey, I have hopes), it is not something I have control over. Yes, I can say play the lottery regularly to perhaps increase my chances, you have to be in it to win it after all, but again that is NOT a step to take to fulfill making more money. Something I do have control over is seeking out more paying clients and writing more. Realistically I can set “dates” by knowing my capabilities as a writer (aka word count) and the time I can devote to writing to know how much work I can take on in any given time period.

What are some of my other resolutions? I want to get more organized. I want to learn new things and keep my mind active. My next resolution is a common for lots of people, I want to improve my health. I plan to see family and friends more often and if distance makes that difficult, stay in touch with them. I want to read more. And I want to find time to simply “meditate”. For each of these resolutions (desires/wants) I will list achievable steps towards that result. It’s like drawing a roadmap to your destination instead of floundering around knowing what you want to happen but having no idea how to make it happen. Making the same resolutions you made and didn’t keep last year will probably fail again without a gameplan.

If you stray from your self-assigned tasks, you can go back to it, don’t just give up. Sometimes even when you think you have full control over a situation, things can happen unexpectedly so just adjust and stay on track. You may have estimated your time based on current performance and abilities, but emergencies and illnesses can change that in an instant. Or you might find that you underestimated yourself. Every (not less than) two to (not more than) six months reevaluate your resolution list with tasks and timelines and fine-tune wherever you see the need. If you make a plan you will have a better chance of satisfying yourself and look forward to making new resolutions next year. Keep making plans until you find one that works.

Happy 2016!

Plan your way there