O.M.G. ~ 68!

 

 

This past Sunday was my dad's heavenly birthday, he was born in 1919 so he would have been 103 years old.

 

Because my mind was doing the math, I also calculated how old I was going to be LATER this year (don't rush it!); I will be 68, yes SIXTY-EIGHT YEARS OLD! Especially in today's world 68 is no longer considered over the hill. But I have NO idea what 68 is supposed to look like. You see my husband's parents, and mine, all died relatively early, between 55 and 61 years of age.

 

It's already mind-blowing that both of us have outlived all four parents, but I thought 68 was SUPPOSED to be OLD. True, my maternal grandmother lived well into her 80s, but she was a phenomenon. In the early 1960s, just before my pre-teen era, my grandma taught me HOW to do the Twist. And when I mean taught, she showed me by going all the way down to the floor and back up again… WITHOUT ASSISTANCE! As for me, she had plenty of chuckles when I fell completely on my derriere!!!! So, this lady, in her mid-60s, had more flexibility than I do at (now) 67 and I try to pick up something I've dropped.

 

If someone were to ask me HOW OLD I FEEL, I would never say in my late 60s. Aside from nagging arthritis and some backaches, I would honestly have to say something like 55. I would admit to being a senior without a doubt, I certainly cannot do some of the things I did in my 30s or even 40s —besides I like to make use of Senior Discounts. Aside from my amazing grandmother, I thought 68 was OLD, and I don't feel that old (most days at least).

 

My husband and I were born into the Baby Boomer Generation. Our kids were born as Millennials.  People there are already TWO age groups past my kids, Generation Z and Generation Alpha! That means FOUR generations past me!!!!! I AM NOT OLD! I don't want to be THAT "cute old lady" my kids introduce to their friends. (Besides we have cats, so I am already that "Crazy Cat Lady")

• The Silent Generation: Born 1928-1945 (76-93 years old)
• Baby Boomers: Born 1946-1964 (57-75 years old)
• Generation X: Born 1965-1980 (41-56 years old)
• Millennials: Born 1981-1996 (25-40 years old)
• Generation Z: Born 1997-2012 (9-24 years old)
• Generation Alpha: Born 2010-2025 (0-11 years old)
                 (according to the PEW Research Center)

The Corporate Finance Institute (CFI) lists some of the common characteristics of the average Baby Boomer… hmm, how accurate is this? Hardworking and Focused??? Personally, I prefer lazy and, as a fiction writer, my mind does tend to wander. Competitive??? I guess I am, I will fight for that last parking spot at the shopping center. Value Relationships??? Definitely, I do. Independent??? I can handle things myself, so long as it's not automotive or electrical. Pursue Excellence and Quality??? So long as I can get a bargain while doing so.

 

CFI cautions marketing campaigns NOT to use the words OLD or ELDERLY because "baby boomers do not consider themselves old, nor do they feel old"…

 

Well, I guess they got that right! So come right on in 68!

 

Stand Up For Yourself

Sometimes it seems that if you don’t advocate for yourself, no one else will. I know that sounds rather pessimistic, there are a few who go out of their way to help others — mostly people are just trying to make it through their own days and their own woes. There really isn’t blame to go around.

Bosses don’t understand when the customer rep takes a little more time to do extra for someone, most times there is an allotted amount of time to spend on each customer no matter how dire their situation. For people unable to look up the right information or communicate their specific needs, well, they wind up being forgotten. So often an elderly person living alone realizes how alone they are when pushing for themselves just gets to tiring to continue the fight. It’s sad when benefits or services they need so much seems beyond their reach.

Loved ones who want to help and ensure that their family is taken care of are sometimes across the country or too busy with their own lives and immediate household; maybe they are busy because their priorities don’t make it convenient and sometimes they have genuine concerns of their own (sickness, money problems, children who depend on them…), and it’s hard to be there for everyone.

It’s frustrating to make repeated phone calls to a doctor’s office only to reach a receptionist each time who tells you they’ve taken your message and yet no return phone call has been made. Everybody is busy. And then there are those special few who go above and beyond to help. There’s the doctor who makes personal phone calls to other doctors to help a patient coordinate the care he/she needs. There’s the insurance representative who actually believes that his/her job description IS CUSTOMER SERVICE. There’s the neighbor who drives someone to the doctor’s office and picks them up after a hospital stay.

The elderly, children with developmental disabilities, returning vets, and those living on meager incomes are all too often the ones who are left to fall through the cracks because there are too few resources, from budgets to time, to help them. Too often we might mimic the cry of Blanche from Streetcar Named Desire and say we must “depend on the kindness of strangers”, but like Blanche, is that kindness actually kind or self-serving? Too many people grasp at whatever help might come their way and sometimes find themselves scammed. It can be heartbreaking.

We need to find some way to advocate for ourselves and our loved ones, it can be terribly exhausting. If the need arises because we ourselves can’t manage the things we need, or because our loved ones need more attention than we can provide, there are (for the elderly) Geriatric Care Managers, but that does cost money and not everyone can afford it — than again can you afford not to get the needed help? That is something that truly needs to be considered.

Learn to advocate for yourself and your loved ones. Get information, ask, research, attend seminars (check out local libraries) and share that info with your friends and family (it might help someone else as well). Understand your rights as a patient, as a renter, as a business customer, and as a human being. Don’t be afraid to speak up for yourself and make yourself heard, if you need help making your feeling clear ask someone to help you. Make notes especially who you speak with and who told you what. Try to keep your emotions at bay, all too often people don’t have the patience or compassion to listen to someone else’s tears or anger. Be firm in your resolve and know that you are worth the effort.