Saturday, November 23, 2013

11/24/13 WEWRIWA a community of writers and readers

Hi! Welcome to another Weekend Writing Warrior round. Every week writers post 8 sentences on their blogs from a published or unpublished book. Then we "hop" around and leave comments on each other's snippets. Whether our work is already published or in progress, the helpful comments help us become stronger writers on our next WIP. We welcome EVERYONE's comments.
See more at the WeWriWa blog.

Continuing with Courage of the Heart: Davie has been rejected and feels humiliated, she's mad as hell. Adam finds he can't walk away and he is not giving up. In this scene he's shown up (unexpectedly) at her door to invite her to dinner. She softens and instead invites him in to share some of the Thanksgiving leftovers that she brought home with her from her family get-together.

"We really seemed to have a good time together until I acted like such an ass, I'd like to try again."

Davie hesitated, "You never did tell me why?"

"What do you mean?"

"You told me you couldn't be the first, why not?" She was puzzled, "I thought most guys loved to be the first. I don't know, I always thought guys wanted to take a girl's virginity because it was like some special prize or something."

"I, uh…" He turned away from her, "It’s a big responsibility, besides I don’t want to hurt you, physically I mean."

She looked at him incredulously, “That’s really lame.”

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Veronica Scott said...

Lame but also intriguing but you're hinting there's more going on here! Definitely makes me want to keep reading, great snippet!

Sara Harris said...

Wow, vivid eight. Great job at getting your heroine to try and understand the male psyche -- can't wait to see what happens next!

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Sarah Cass said...

The last line had me giggling a little...but the rest was really great. I love that he's hesitant because he doesn't want to hurt her...and maybe she'll see that it isn't so lame, but one of the nicest things a guy can say.

Jess Schira said...

Her response is very organic. Love the back and forth between the characters. Great snippet.

HistorySleuth said...

That is so realistic. There are two camps with guys on being the first. Those who love it and those who are afraid to because it is a big deal. Great 8! and her answer to all of that is spot on. :)
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Unknown said...

This is cute. He may still end up being the first : )

Unknown said...

Flimsy excuse - but I love that he cares about her. I think that mentality has come around more recently for men. It used to be such a prize to be won, but a lot more boys/men are now considering it a massive undertaking. It's really interesting to see how times have changed, and you've illustrated it so well, especially with Davie's reaction!

Great eight!

Chelle Cordero said...

Yes, Adam does care about Davie, very much - but Veronica, you are very good at picking up on those hints. Thank you all for your comments.

Sarah W said...

Davie's last line is excellent, Chelle. :D

Methinks overprotective Adam is overthinking this just a bit . . .

Sue Ann Bowling said...

You'll get one try at this, because that's all I'll give a captcha. I think he's being a lot more responsible than she is.

Anonymous said...

She's got a point there, although he's obviously trying to be sensitive to the longer term issues.