Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors where we share 8 sentences of our writing every weekend.
She watched as the car rolled down the embankment. Annie was frustrated as usual because there was nothing she could do to stop it; she was next to the car and could see inside. The man who was driving was dead; she was able to tell even without touching him. She could see the life as it drained from his body.
The woman sitting next to him was dying. “Help them, please,” the woman’s lips barely moved, she didn’t move. But Annie knew she motioned to the backseat. “Save my babies…,” she looked expectantly at Annie.
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I liked this a lot. The only thing I would have changed was "she could see the life draining from his body." Everything else was superb. Lots of tension, and definitely a great snippet to get people interested enough to purchase the book!
Very well-done and well-chosen eight. Hope to see more of your work next weekend!
Oh, babies in the backseat...interesting snippet!
I thought that was so cold until I reread the intro and saw it was a dream. What a horrible situation to be in and not be able to do anything. Got my emotions going. Great8
What a scene! You've painted a dream so real I had chills reading. Definitely a To Be Read book.
Heartwrenching. Well done.
Another great use of the eights--emotional and engaging! Well done, Chelle!
very vivid. hope Anne gets to the kids in time
Wow, intense! Quite the dream your character is having, can't wait to see what happens next. Very effective excerpt!
I know it's a dream but I'm feeling frustrated - save those babies! Great 8. :)
Annie is beginning to control coming in and out of her dreams at this scene - and a lot of things begin to change.
Thank you all for your wonderful comments.
Another restful night for Annie. I wonder if she can help or just have to watch.
Ooooo, creepy! And a brilliant way to add some serious tension by first mentioning her inability to do anything, and then presenting the trapped babies in the back seat!! Great 8.
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