I know what you did... ~ #MondayBlogs

Knowing where all the bodies are buried (figuratively) is a daunting responsibility.

Between the easy availability of personal information and things that have been said and done basically in front of me, I find that I have kept many secrets for others. Just search a person's name on the internet, use a genealogy database, find a person's Facebook profile, and simply listening to most people who might tend to get a bit loose with their tongues, and it's not hard to possess secret background info.

Okay MOST of the info is not criminal or earth-shattering to the many, but most of the secrets would cause extreme embarrassment to its owners.

Ironically many people don't realize how much personal information (even details they want to keep hidden) can be found online, are told at family or school reunions, get worked into conversations and sometimes are hinted at or spilled by themselves — especially if the person has had a few drinks  — and then at some point days, or even years, later the truth comes out. Sometimes an individual has fabricated a complete lie (guilt? ego? shame?) and then gets tangled in the details.

I know secrets that some people have tried their best to keep hidden; maybe I was there when something happened, maybe I heard it from another knowledgeable party, or maybe I accidentally came across it while I researched something unrelated for an article I was assigned... but the fact is, I know.

I've heard war stories from someone who never served, about offspring that had no knowledge of half-siblings, know of marriages that weren't really the first for each but that's what one party was told, criminal histories that didn't get divulged even on job applications, certifications and diplomas that were counterfeit, and more. Sometimes anger at someone who has belittled others or been careless about other people's feelings have led me to IMAGINE spilling the beans, I've managed to resist so far.

When faced with knowledge about someone I try to see who the truth would actually cause pain to and resist the temptation; most times the true victim would be a complete innocent. When faced with with an unpleasant truth and then seeing the liar causing more pain (like the father who claimed to but never served making his son feel less than a man because a physical impairment kept the son out of service), it sometimes is so tempting. Sometimes though, no matter how tempting, I know I would crush belief systems, destroy a child's admiration for a parent, and cause emotional pain to a spouse who considers the mate to be the world.

I may not be willing to expose some of these secrets or lies, but that doesn't mean they will never be found out. Someone else may also know and perhaps that someone will act with malice. Imagine the pain a loved one may feel when, after a death, paperwork is sorted for insurance purposes and such and disturbing details come to light and suddenly the loss of a loved one is compounded by not even being able to ask questions or talk about it. And the day you are found out that embarrassment may be multiplied many times over.

If you have a dark secret make sure that those around you won't get blindsided. Most secrets are often a bit of embarrassment to the owner, but they can be a devastating loss to the loved ones who always believed in you. Take away the power from those who may have learned your secrets unwillingly, or even purposely, and allow your loved ones to really know you.

Contagion - #MondayBlogs

As if there weren’t enough frightening things going on in the world today, we’re hearing news reports about Ebola and Enterovirus – no one feels like extending their hands In friendship for any reason.

What can we do to protect ourselves from everything contagious including influenza, the common cold, HIV, Hepatitus and TB? Know the facts, use common sense, take precautions to protect yourself AND unsuspecting folks around you, and seek the proper and immediate medical care if you suspect that you have been exposed or have symptoms.

The Center for Disease Control and Prevention (the CDC) offers great information about exposure risk factors for Ebola and tips to recognize symptoms at http://www.cdc.gov/vhf/ebola/outbreaks/2014-west-africa/qa.html

In general we should all be practicing healthy habits such as frequent hand washing, cleaning and disinfecting food preparation surfaces, sneezing into your sleeve, storing food at prescribed temperatures, get recommended vaccines, and staying home when you are sick so you don’t generously share the germs. Health care workers, although still learning, are being trained to effectively care and treat those who are ill without contaminating themselves or spreading the germs to others. It is frightening though since so much is unknown in the world of infectious diseases.

I once watched a group of teens who were receiving first response emergency medical training. Unknown to the teens, the instructor “sprinkled” the pseudo victim with glow-in-the-dark powder. Most of the teens donned gloves and even wrapped the “patient” cocoon style for transport to prevent contamination. After they were done and removed their protective gear the instructor turned out the overhead lights and the scene was unbelievable. Several of the students had inadvertently touched themselves in unprotected areas, had handled equipment and had contaminated their partners on scene – all without realizing. It was a terrific lesson which taught them to seriously use PPE (personal protection equipment) and care.

Right now New York and New Jersey are arguing for a 21-day quarantine period for anyone exposed or suspected to have been exposed to Ebola. There are those who believe this is tantamount to unlawful imprisonment while others say it is the safest way to keep from spreading any potential disease to the public and loved ones. I spoke to an EMS provider who told me of an in-house employee discussion; the majority of those present said they would voluntarily enter into quarantine and not take the chance of infecting their families. I agree. How do you think you would feel if you believed you had the potential of passing something dangerous on to family, neighbors, co-workers and even strangers on the street?

Meanwhile the rest of us need to carry on with our lives and our responsibilities. We need to follow REASONABLE and healthy routines and try our darnedest not to live in any kind of crippling fear. Learn all you can about the common diseases out there and if you are able, support research efforts into cures and prevention.

Don’t Worry, Be Happy.