Many… many years ago I got a Summer
Stock gig in upstate New York. It was the summer of 1974 and I was excited. It
was my first time living away from my parents’ home and on my own.
I met a lot of new people that
summer, they came from all over the country and to a kid who grew up in “da
Bronx”, NYC, it was interesting to meet so many and hear about all of their
experiences. There was no shortage of fun times and parties and we each formed our
own circle of pals.
I hung out with the light and sound
crew (I was there as a lighting technician), I was the only female in this
small group. One of the guys, I’ll call him Howard to protect his identity,
came from a small town in Vermont. It was Howard’s first time away from home as
well, his first time meeting people who didn’t live in his small town.
The first day we met I was wearing a
Star of David pendent and I noticed that he was staring at me whenever he
thought I didn’t see. Finally I asked him what was up. He apologized and a few minutes
later he sat next to me at the dimmer board and asked me if I really was
Jewish. I said yes and asked him why he wanted to know. He pointed to my
necklace.
I was not expecting his next words. They
were innocent and knocked the breath out of me.
“I never met a Jewish person before.
I was always told Jews had horns.” And he quickly apologized. Howard told me
that his parents, aunts and uncles all lived in that small town and went to the
one church that everyone went to. Everyone was the same where he grew up and
they all said that Jews had horns.
I laughed nervously and said, “Well
we don’t.”
He asked a lot of innocent questions
about my religion, my Spanish surname, growing up in a big city and more. In
Judaism it’s a mitzvah (commandment) to teach and so I was happy to answer his questions,
questions which came from pure curiosity — he was seeing the world outside of
his small home town for the first time.
Howard called his parents that night
to ask if they had ever seen a Jew with horns and they admitted that they never
did. When he asked why they told him that there were horns they said that’s
what they had been told by their parents as they grew up in that same small
town. They expressed nervousness when he said he had a Jewish friend but at his
insistence they decided to let him decide for himself who he could be friends
with.
I did meet them later in the summer
and they were actually very nice people. I don’t know what happened to Howard and
his family when the summer was over, I went home to plan my wedding and we
never really stayed in touch. But I would like to think that just maybe they
stopped telling people the stereotype they were raised with. Just maybe they
were a little bit more accepting of people who were different than them and
maybe there was a little less prejudice in that small Vermont town.
Don’t teach your children prejudice
because they like to believe that Mommy and Daddy are always right. Children
learn from their parents.
