War Stories

With Memorial Day just behind us, I couldn't help but remember sitting and listening to both my Dad and my Father-in-law telling AND RETELLING their favorite WW2 war stories. Although they certainly avoided some of the gorier and distressing points, they were always excited to brag about their heroics and laugh about exploits they shared with their comrades-in-arms.

 

It's not just soldiers who boast about their adventures and take pride in their experiences.  I am very proud to be a part of a first response family… heck, I spent nearly three decades as an EMT myself. While my husband and I  are now the “old, retired folk", our four kids (two born in and two joined by love) are all in various forms of first response.

 

Being seated around us in a restaurant or such must be surrealistic as invariably one of us starts off a story with “remember that time when…”. And of course we can't completely contain our laughter when we recall some of the funnier incidents. Of course we are all still bound by privacy laws so no personal information ever gets out there.

 

Of course it's not just military or emergency responders who do a  bit of bragging, lol. Within our family we've been regaled with stories of courtroom drama that could rival the best episodes of “Bull". We've also been treated to the literal ups and downs of elevator repair and so much more. Tales of our exploits, the people we've encountered, and the things we have done make us who we are.

 

Everybody wants the opportunity to know that something they have done has made a positive difference in someone's life. Boasting may not be considered a virtue, but it is just being human to pat yourself on the back a bit and want to share with those around you.

 

So the next time you hear someone's stories of their exploits, take a moment to listen.

The Survivor, The Monsters & The Giants

…a humorous (semi) fictional tale

THE SURVIVOR

Dear Diary,

It’s been a few weeks since I found shelter.

I was beginning to give up hope, there were too many times that I had to burrow through that white icy stuff. Finally I found a haven, it took a while but I eventually thawed out. But it was time to go out and explore this new world that I found refuge in. And I had to forage for some food, there were only so many bugs my palate could tolerate.

So I cautiously ventured out and it was TERRIFYING. I encountered two huge hairy monsters. Unaware of the danger they posed, I fell victim to one of them — he grabbed me with his mouth using his sharp teeth, I could smell his fetid breath as I dangled in fear of my life. Suddenly we were facing a second monster, his eyes fastened on my swinging body. The first monster wasn’t going to give me up and he took off in a fast gallop and I jerked violently side to side. He got far away from the other monster and dropped me penned into a corner and as he batted at me I was sure I was going to be ripped to pieces.

I was desperate and I darted to the side and managed to allude him, I ran for my life only to come face-to-face with the other monster. I thought quickly, there were places to hide and I quickly lunged under something big and shiny nearby. Both monsters ran after me trying to reach me with their sharp talons. I pinned myself to the back wall as far out of their reach as possible. The monsters began keening, a sick and high pitched wail, it hurt my ears. Their cries for support, for help, were soon answered.

She was a giant with fuzzy feet and some kind of radio transmitters on her head. That big object was obviously too big for her to move and she left for a moment. While the monsters stood watching me to make sure I couldn’t escape, the giant came back with a light that she shined into my eyes nearly blinding me and a metal claw in her hand. She tried and nearly succeeded in grabbing my body with her claw, but although I felt the cold metal brush me, she didn’t manage to grab me to pull me towards her. She finally gave up and left me to the watchful glowing eyes of the two monsters.

It was finally daylight when one of the monsters left and the remaining one seemed to close his eyes. I ran, but the monster guarding me woke and leapt after me. I darted under something else, but not before I saw the second monster returning followed by a bigger giant who walked with three legs, one of them was a long narrow stick that he seemed able to detach from his body. Unlike the woman giant his head was shiny, maybe a solar panel that fueled his energy now that the sun had come up? He bent before the object and stuck that long stick leg under it and chased me from side to side. I managed to jump over the stick leg and found an opening away from where the giant and the two monsters were crouching.

I escaped and ran back to my camp, far from their sharp talons, metal claws and long stick legs. I’ll have to settle for eating a few more bugs for now, but I am safe. It will be a while before I venture out again.

~~~~~~~~

ONE OF THE MONSTERS

Dear Diary,

Yay, Mommy bought us a new toy and I found it first. My brother wanted to play with it but I ran all the way into my room with it.

Man, it moves so fast. I couldn’t even see where it got wound up. I couldn’t catch it and neither could my brother. It got stuck under the big chug-chug machine where Mommy throws dirty laundry and I guess the wind up ran out because we couldn’t get it out. Even Mommy tried.

Someone must have found a way to wind it up again. I dozed for just a few moments and it whizzed right past me. I ran after my new toy, and my brother and my Daddy came into the room from the other side. Dang it, the toy changed direction and went right under Daddy’s chair. We were trying to reach it when it whizzed out the other side and right into the kitchen.

Now it’s stuck behind that big thing in the kitchen where Mommy keeps the food. Maybe it will come out again.

~~~~~~~~

THE WOMAN GIANT

Mark, there’s a mouse in the house!

The Survivor

The Monsters

The Fictional Life of a Fiction Writer ~ #MondayBlogs

We’ve all seen those funny T-shirts and mugs warning people that THE WRITER is around and ready to put them into the next story. One would think that people would tend not to want to disclose personal info once they’ve been warned “Be careful what you say, you could wind up in my next book.”

I adore creating characters that I have (almost) total control over, they take my advice with little argument and even though sometimes they need a bit of nudging, they don’t disappoint. And the best part, I can KILL someone off if I so desire! However I have found that a writer does have to be careful when doing research…

There was the, time I needed help in “hiding” a murder that would eventually be found once the medical examiner knew what he was looking for after exhuming the body. So I called an acquaintance who worked as an investigator at the local MEs office, explained that I was researching a story and asked my questions. He was very cooperative and helpful — until I thanked him and was ready to hang up the phone. I was then subjected to a few minutes of his questions making sure that everything was okay between my husband and me.

Considering the topics that writers discuss on the phone with editors, publishers and critique buddies, we must truly keep the NSA hopping. Paranoia set in one day when my sister and I were discussing a murder scene and we both thought we heard a few clicks on the phone, every minute or so after that one of us would speak clearly into the phone and state this is for a fiction story we were formulating.

I have discovered that my husband is not appreciative of those sudden lightbulb moments I get after trying to work out a scene and somewhere in the middle of dinner and I say “Oh yeah, I have to make so&so do that!” It took him a while to realize I wasn’t talking about some long lost relative turned up during a genealogy search a long lost cousin was conducting. Of course sometimes I talk in my sleep and mumble about all these juicy tidbits that leave him wondering exactly what I do all day.

And of course all of the research I do as a writer, both for my fiction and my alter-ego journalist, turns into all of this useless trivia knowledge, but G-d forbid I can hold my own during a couples’ Trivial Pursuit game.

Yep, being a writer is certainly an adventure.

Can You Diagnose This Mole? — #MondayBlogs

Doctors are not the only ones at parties who are asked for “professional” opinions. Being a romance writer leaves the door open to a lot of rather embarrassing discussions.

I am often asked for relationship advice, after all my characters always celebrate a Happy Ever After; after listening to as little as possible, not because I don’t care about these people (even strangers), but because sometimes the info gets a little too personal for what I want to hear. I usually smile and tell the people talking to me that it’s certain that they care/love the other person so maybe they should be talking with their partner… bear in mind that I am not talking about book discussions or author appearances. Most people smile and say they’ll take my advice and “Thank you very much”.

I really love writing and reading romance novels. I think everyone should be in love. My favorite of all is combining suspense or mystery with a good and spicy romance. I also like thrilling edge-of-your-seat thrillers. Most of my novels have been categorized as contemporary romantic suspense.

Now to be honest some of my books are fairly explicit in sexual activities (no, NOT soft porn as my son often accuses me of) but there are definitely appropriate and monogamous sex scenes. The most embarrassing conversation I ever had was with the husband-part of a couple we were once very good friends with. After reading one of my books he stopped over one day and followed me around while I was gardening. After some regular innocuous conversation he started to complain how “uptight” his wife was in the bedroom and how he wished she would be… more like the heroine in my book.

To be honest I wanted to crawl under the bush! I tried ignoring and then changing the subject. It didn’t help. Finally I just blurted out, “Go home and speak to her, not me.” He gave a quick apology and finally changed the subject only to return to a similar conversation a few minutes later. This time I asked him, strongly suggested, that he go home. He did. For a long time I was never very comfortable in this couple’s company after that — I just couldn’t get the image out of my mind. I did tell my husband who agreed not to get involved unless it happened a second time. Thankfully her husband never brought it up again. We’ve since parted ways with this couple.

By the way, whenever I get the chance I have taken to wearing a T-shirt another friend had given me, across the front are the words “Be careful what you say, you might wind up in one of my books.” People do tend to clam up when they think about it.

The 15 installments of Pussy Cat Tales

Throughout the month of October I posted 15 installments of my humorous look at life with felines, Pussy Cat Tales from The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero short story collection

on my Author Chelle Cordero FaceBook page

I hope you enjoyed this FREE read!

...oh no, did you miss it?????

Don't worry, you can catch up now ~ just go to my Facebook page
(& you don't even have to LIKE the page... although that sure would be appreciated!)

but wait! Mario, Luigi & Tigger want me to make it easier for you.

just click on the numbers below and go directly to each installment:

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

Okay, did you like it? I hope it made you smile.

BUY LINKS

AUDIO –   http://www.amazon.com/The-Many-Faces-Chelle-Cordero/dp/B00HK1HCIA

And if you decide to use the Amazon-exclusive Audible.com 30-day free trial membership it includes:This audiobook free, plus a bonus audiobook of your choice

 PRINT – http://www.amazon.com/Many-Faces-Chelle-Cordero-Collection/dp/0615839231

Kindle – http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00D8NL6U4

AllRomance Ebooks – https://www.omnilit.com/product-themanyfacesofchellecordero-1222674-237.html

iBooks – https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/many-faces-chelle-cordero/id661486812

Smashwords for All Ereaders – https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/323744

 & Sony, Nook, Kindle, Apple, Kobo and more

I hope that you've enjoyed Pussy Cat Tales (just follow the links on this post or scroll down after each post on my FaceBook Author page to click to the next installment) ~

Would you PLEASE post a review of Pussy Cat Tales on any site under The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero, it would really be appreciated...

and don't forget you can get a FREE audio download of NOT ALONE, another story from the Many Faces collection at http://bit.ly/1QPuvB9

Thank you!

Are you taking advantage? Read a FREE story, Pussy Cat Tales

Throughout the month of September, I'm posting my short story Pussy Cat Tales in serialized version. Pussy Cat Tales (an amusing look at a lifetime with cats) is one of the short stories in The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero 


Come to my Facebook Author page every other day for another installment. The next installment is due Thursday, September 10.


Catch up with previous installments:
part 1: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorChelleCordero/posts/941510175892493
part 2: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorChelleCordero/posts/941510729225771
part 3: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorChelleCordero/posts/941511319225712
part 4: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorChelleCordero/posts/941511789225665

THE MANY FACES OF CHELLE CORDERO

Buy Links

Smashwords

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

iTunes

Kobo

Read a FREE short story ~ Visit Author Chelle Cordero on Facebook

 

 Starting tomorrow, Sept 2, and through the month, I will be posting my short story Pussy Cat Tales in serialized version on my Facebook page. Come back every other day for another installment.

Pussy Cat Tales (an amusing look at a lifetime with cats) is one of the short stories in The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero.

Enjoy! Visit Author Chelle Cordero​ to follow along.

The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero

Buy Links

Smashwords

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

iTunes

Kobo

Wish I had recorded that! ~ #MondayBlogs

Oh for those moments in our lives when we wish someone was filming us so we could submit the video to America's Funniest Home Videos and make some money! Alas most of these things happen too fast and we don't have the time to set up a camera ourselves...

Two of my three curious felines decided to investigate floor tile glue downstairs during a DIY remodeling. Needless to say after leaving a trail of paw prints through the tacky gunk they came back upstairs to the carpeted living room where walking on the carpet was getting frustrated as they STUCK to the fibers.

First chasing them down (both my husband and I) and then locking the two in the bathroom with me to start cleaning. So while I was in the little room with two frightened, angry and hissing cats using alcohol, soapy water and baby oil - and getting as drenched as their fur - hubby was still chasing the third cat to make sure he hadn't played follow the leader; thank goodness there was no evidence of dumbness with him.

I called out to my husband, through the closed door of course to prevent escape, to get the name and content label and call for veterinarian advice. Oh by the way, this was after 10:00 PM already. He called and got an answering service, was told the location of the nearest 24-hour emergency office and also was given the phone number to the ASPCA Poison Control Hotline.

While there is a fee for the hotline (which goes to the support of the ASPCA programs), it was invaluable for our nerves. We were told what had to be done and reassured that this case of curiosity would not kill the cats. Also the fee (per incident so covered the three cats, we still weren't sure about the third) was still less than a vet visit for just one stuck-up pussycat. If you have a furbaby, post this number by your phone:  (888) 426-4435.   Info can be found here   https://www.aspca.org/pet-care/animal-poison-control.

As I finally reached to open the bathroom door (singing Who Let The Dogs Out?) and stood aside for the great escape of two very bedraggled and upset felines, I started to laugh. Once I changed into my own dry clothing once again, I returned to the living room as hubby was coming back upstairs - he had finished doubling the height of the barricades around the tacky downstairs floor.

We both sat and laughed, yes cruelly, of the site of the two cats hopping across the living room carpet and then we sighed over the loss of ten-thousand dollars we could have made if only someone had been there to film the whole tacky event.

all 3 - safe, sound and unglued
Mario ~ Luigi ~ Tigger
Luigi & Tigger were the culprits!

#TBT - Previously published on Romance Junkies in 2008

Romance Fiction – not just Porn! 

from Chelle Cordero

“Hi, my name is Chelle and I am a romance writer.” I receive a round of applause and several personal shouts of “Hi Chelle!” And over milk and cookies, we discuss the 12-steps towards REAL writing… (the preceding is a dramatization and should not be attempted, etc and so forth)

Why is it that many writers in the romance genre feel that they must announce their forte in clandestine meetings and apologize for their behavior?

Hey all, I write romance. I am not ashamed of the stories I weave. Yes, there is sex and sometimes I may even find myself blushing as I read aloud at an author event. I have oft been the recipient of “tsk, tsk” and “I’m sorry, I won’t read romance books.” And men, oy, they won’t be caught reading a romance novel, no matter how good a story you may tell. My son-in-law teased me that he planned to cover my first novel with a cookbook cover so he could read it on the train while heading in to work!

The romance genre has gotten a bad rep and romance writers are regarded with condescending amusement. And yet, Romance Writers of America has the following statistics on their website: “Romance fiction: $1.375 billion in estimated revenue for 2007, Religion/inspirational: $819 million, Science fiction/fantasy: $700 million, Mystery: $650 million, and Classic literary fiction: $466 million. Of those who read books in 2007, one in five read romance novels.” Impressive.Often referred to as escapism or fluff, the romance genre is known for the “formula” – boy meets girl, boy falls in love with girl, boy loses girl over some stupidity that can’t be helped, boy wins girl back, and they live happily ever after. But if all writers followed the “formula” without a real story plot, do you honestly believe that $1.375 billion would have changed hands in 2007? Romance has many sub-genres as well and contemporary romance (the here and now, situations the average reader can relate to) remains the leader of the pack.

During a recent discussion with my editor/publisher, I asked for her definition of romance, erotica and porn – all too often used to delineate categories of romance. Her response was simple, the focus of the story and whether the plot and love came before or after the sex in the book. This put it all into perspective for me. Just like the ingredient label on our breakfast cereals, which comes first?

To date I have written four contemporary romance novels; three have been published and the fourth, Courage of the Heart (actually a modernized re-release from 2001) is due out in February. The ingredient labels on Bartlett’s Rule, Forgotten, Within the Law and the aforementioned Courage of the Heart would read: Love story. Sub-plots and twists, Sex – yep, they are romance novels. A fifth novel, due out in the summer, is called Final Sin. Final Sin’s ingredient label would read Crime-Suspense story, sub-plots and twist, love story and sex; while there is certainly sex involved, it is more relevant to the crime than to the love story. (I have been assured by the haters of romance novels that they are looking forward to reading my NON-romance.)

Some of the most popular stories throughout time have involved intricate love stories although some do not have happy-ever-after endings: Romeo and Juliet, Gone With the Wind, West Side Story, Guys and Dolls, Gift of the Magi, and more. Many modern day movies and box-office hits illustrate the theme of love and sex: 27 Dresses, Pretty Woman, Love Story, Casablanca, Sleepless in Seattle…

It seems that the story of romance is here to stay. And if you decide to pick up a romance novel, you just might find yourself intrigued by the story.

http://chellecordero.blogspot.com

available from Amazon.com

Skeletons in the Closet

     I just had a really good chuckle reading a quote from George Bernard Shaw,

"If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance."

This particular phrase has a funny, special memory for me...

Just weeks before my wedding, my then fiance and I were in my bedroom in my parents' Bronx apartment - he was sitting on my bed while I was packing clothing and getting ready to move into OUR new home, a one bedroom and overpriced apartment in the Hudson Valley.

Mark thought he was being cute when he said, with a straight face, "Well I guess I should have asked before, but we're getting married soon so I can't put it off any longer. Do you have any skeletons in the closet I should know about?"

I looked at him and then at my CLOSED wardrobe door (actually two sliding doors), he couldn't understand my surprised expression. Before he could reassure me that he was only joking, I slid one of the wardrobe doors open - and there, hanging carefully on the closet rod, was a life size cardboard Halloween skeleton! He almost fell off of my bed.

What Mark didn't know was that my parents always allowed me to set up the entry hallway for Halloween. I had rigged this skeleton to come rushing towards the door when I opened it - it always elicited excited shrieks from the little trick-or-treaters. LOL, I never expected to shock my future husband!

We all have some kind of skeleton in our closet - everyone has something to be embarrassed about, some have regrets, and a few have outright horror at the thought of discovery. It's the same for each of my characters - take Tom Hughes from Within the Law for instance...

Tom is easily my favorite hero from any of my books because he is soooo human. He is endearing, a truly good guy, but he is certainly not an angel! Tom has things in his past that he would prefer not having to admit to, things that get broadcast in a packed courtroom when he shows up to TRY to put his high school girlfriend's murderer away. And he has a temper, oy such a temper, that he manages MOST TIMES to control, but loses it during a face-to-face with the lowlife who took the girl away from him.

Tom is not the only one of my characters to have something to hide: Brandon Price in His Lucky Charm wants to hide his privileged upbringing and estranged relationship with his father; in A Chaunce of Riches Samantha Chaunce has to hide the reason she left Ben and married Julian; Adam Sherman in Courage of the Heart is ashamed of his past and worries that he is going to lose Davie once she finds out about it; and in Karma Visited Annie Furman needs to keep her unique gift hidden for fear of ridicule and worse.

Do you have a skeleton in your closet?

Please don't post any true confessions, lol, but think about it; what secret do you have in your past that you would really rather be kept as a buried secret? Was your secret ever exposed and if so how did you cope with it - with a head held high or a face redder than cherries?

And if you really, really need to share, please feel free to comment below.

FREE Preview of The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero in Audio

Download the audio story NOT ALONE 

from this short story collection [FREE]

http://store.payloadz.com/go?id=1901660

(narrated by Wendy Tremont King)

About the English language

I received the following humorous tidbit from a friend the other day and I thought it was worth sharing...

Read all the way to the end...
This took a lot of work to put together! 
   
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse morerefuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture..
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in thedesert..
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.  
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewerline.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow tosow.
17) The wind was too strong for me to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear..
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) How can I intimate this to my most intimatefriend?

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. - Why doesn't 'Buick' rhyme with 'quick'?

You lovers of the English language might enjoy this.

There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is 'UP.'
It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP?
At a meeting, why does a topic come UP?
Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UPfor election and why is it UP to the secretary to writeUP a report?
We call UP our friends.
And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver; we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen.
We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car.
At other times the little word has real special meaning.
People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UPan appetite, and think UP excuses.
To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special.
A drain must be opened UP because it is stoppedUP.
We open UP a store in the morning but we close itUP at night.
We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP!
To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP,look the word UP in the dictionary.
In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions.
If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used.
It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't giveUP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more.
When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP.
When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP.
When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things UP.
When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP.
One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP,
for now my time is UP,
so.......it is time to shut UP!

Imagine if you were immigrant to the country and had to learn English.

Hyphema    by Chelle Cordero
From the Series: EMS Novels by Chelle Cordero,  
Hyphema: Bleeding in the eye caused by trauma… Matt Garratti, a paramedic from New York, moves his wife and son to North Carolina to work at his dream job as a flight medic. Pakistani born Sudah, his wife, receives frosty stares and insensitive comments from their new neighbors... Matt wonders if he is pursuing his dream or bringing his family into a nightmare from which they may never wake.

The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero - YouTube video

The Many Faces of Chelle Cordero Short Story Collection Volume 1

including:

Nine short stories and a special bonus section, featuring:
Introduction
Pussycat Tails
Holiday Happiness
Not Alone
I Swear That Raccoon Just Knocked on the Door
Stormy Weather
A Mother’s Love
More Than a Friend
The Meeting
The Vacation

Available on Smashwords http://bit.ly/13sN86Q
and on Amazon Kindle :http://amzn.to/13sMXZt

from Vanilla Heart Publishing