CONNECTIONS

Our always-on-social-media, while there are downsides, has the ability to reach out and communicate at a needed time. Sometimes it may not mean much for someone to have a virtual stranger wish her a Happy Birthday, but then maybe it just might be the lift she needs to get through today.

Scroll through platforms like Facebook and people share heartaches and disappointments, brag about accomplishments, offer condolences, share jokes and any myriad of emotions. Users announce the loss of loved ones, and ask for prayers, or say thanks for being there when you were really needed.

PEOPLE NEED PEOPLE. We all need interaction with others. We need to vent, to ask for advice, to offer and accept virtual hugs, to complain about the weather, and so much more. Especially after this past year when so many were in near complete isolation, social media and visual apps were the things that helped to keep folks in touch with others.

It may not seem like much when social media acquaintances post a GIF or Meme to help cheer you up, but it does have the ability to make you feel as if someone cared. Many of those who post condolences, encouragement, congratulations or support may only be expending a few moments and a few keystrokes — but they are spending those few moments ON YOU. Someone took the time, their precious time, to let you know that someone is out there.

Next month is National Suicide Prevention Month. There are several reasons why some attempt, or unfortunately succeed, at committing suicide. Among the reasons for suicide, loneliness is one of the major factors. Whether you pay a visit, make a phone call, or simply make it a point to remember someone on social media, you could make a crucial difference in their feelings of loneliness and of being forgotten.

You may be that person’s reason for getting through today and hopefully tomorrow.

If you ever feel the need, or know someone else
who is contemplating suicide,

Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

OR

Text GO to 741741 to reach a trained Crisis Counselor through Crisis Text Line, a global not-for-profit organization. Free, 24/7, confidential.

 

 

 

Don’t Believe Everything You Read On The Internet!

The internet is filled with rumors and little twists to the truth… BUT the internet also allows very easy access to loads of research which just might be a bit more revealing and truthful.

When I am on a social media network and see a meme about critical thought, outrageous tales, or financial advice I do NOT ignore it; I also don’t re-post it without doing my research first. I make it a habit to find multiple sources about the alleged quote or incident, and I often find several conflicting views. I want to be informed so I do read or listen to several views, EVEN THE ONES I MIGHT OPPOSE. Prepared with information, various viewpoints and multiple sources (yes, sometimes foreign newspapers can give a reader a different perspective) I then MAKE UP MY OWN MIND before passing along the meme or refuting it.

It is actually liberating to be informed and THINK FOR YOURSELF!

BTW, a very important part of my research is to learn WHO is saying what. Very often honest sites will tell you a little about their political leanings or if they are producing known satire or humor; obviously a “right-wing viewpoint” would be in opposition to “left wing” EVEN IF THEY ARE EACH ATTEMPTING TO TELL THE TRUTH. Remember that reporters are HUMAN and it is natural for biased leanings, sometimes it’s just the tone of voice or the way something is worded that can alter the impression.

Some sites are not so forthright as to their leanings, search the company name or managing editor — one self-professed source of truth and honesty is actually being run by an individual who has had Dept. of Labor investigations into his firing employees who have reported on views and topics he vehemently opposes. Result, just a “bit” on one-sided reporting.

Don’t be afraid to read and learn about opposing viewpoints, it’s not going to contaminate you to listen to what someone else has to say, not if you are sure of your own viewpoint. When I was in grade-school, long loooonnng ago, I had a few fantastic and open minded teachers. One teacher, Mr. Newman, taught us how to debate but before assigning topics he had us each fill out a poll about semi-controversial topics. When he handed out assignments he ALWAYS had us arguing the opposite side of what we personally believed in. Frustrated I asked him why he did that and he told me “unless you understand other viewpoints you can never be sure that what you believe in is really right for you.”

So use the internet, local libraries, different news channels and listening to to others, REALLY LISTENING. Gather as many facts as presented by multiple sources as you can and THINK FOR YOURSELF, don’t follow the crowd just because it looks like the popular thing to do.

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Moving On

As we grow older we experience many changes in our lives, we move on from jobs, lifestyles, and losses. When we reach retirement we often find ourselves moving on to new residences, new surroundings. It’s a wonderful new beginning!

The problem is as we move on to new places we wind up leaving a lot behind. We can take our memories with us, but we leave behind attachments… and friends. Often we’re not the only ones leaving a place behind, our friends have chosen to move on as well. Nowadays our best friends are scattered from L.A. to North Carolina and back to lower Manhattan, all people we once shared neighborhoods with. It’s hard and rare to see each other in person, gone are the last minute impromptu dinners and the touch of a friend’s arm across the shoulders to help work out some problem.

With the miracle of technology we don’t have to say goodbye at least, we can call on the phone, email, or even see each other on a screen as we video chat and all in real time — still it’s not the same. Being pen-pals isn't enough, the letters take their time getting to your friend's door. The benefit of social media allows us to stay in touch without much effort and in the company of thousands, kind of loses the intimacy of that special bond that friends can form. It’s what we have.

We can always make new friends without letting go (completely) of the older friends (not in age but in longevity). The problem with new friends is that you don’t share history, it’s harder for new friends to just “get you”. How much of your own personal history are you willing to share, how much do you need to share before your new friends really KNOW you? And do you rewrite your history to fit in with your new crowd?

This is life in 2019. It’s a rare individual that is born, grows up in and dies in the same small town for all of their life. We make moves and follow jobs and passions. Is what we are leaving behind too great a loss?

It’s not our fault we made the move, sometimes we weren’t even the first to leave the old neighborhood. I guess that part of growing up is knowing how to keep your friendships even across the miles… it’s not always easy, but definitely worth it.

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All about writing and being a writer

This week’s lesson…

It’s Time to Start Writing: all about writing a synopsis, a blurb, a book description, a logliner and a tag line

And recent lessons…

Socially Acceptable Networking: using social media to build your author platform and promote yourself and your book

Oh, But It Is a Business: it takes more than just writing a book to be a professional writer

OUCH, Editing Errors: learn to self edit and improve the appearance of your manuscript

The Good, the Bad and the Foe: making the most of your villains

Every blog comes with Writing Exercises and Prompts

Writing Exercise: Using your own life as the basis, write down the highlights and make sure to include happy times and disappointments as well as your dreams and hopes. Using this description, create a “hero” and a “villain” and the way they might react to marriage, career and money.

Writing Prompt: In no more than five minutes, write down every action word you can think of (it’s okay if you use different forms of the word such as run-runs-running)

Writing Exercise:  We’ve all heard biblical stories, choose one. Rewrite the story in 2013. For example, what would happen if a man came across a burning bush and expected his followers to understand while he stayed there to receive a significant message? Try to keep the miracle, but with the reactions and settings of today.

Writing Prompt:  Think of the most evil character you’ve ever written about, or use one that you’ve read about if you need. Describe their best childhood friend and whether they miss them today.